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Wants Before Needs
Procrastination could or should be my middle name. When I was young and my mom was at work, there were certain things that had to be done before she came home. I was home alone and my pastime of choice was watching old movies. The duties I had could wait, especially if there was a Cary Grant or Clark Gable or Robert Mitcham movie on TV. I loved sitting with my back against the ottoman watching old classic movies. I would watch the clock and time it out so I could run around like a crazy person and get my tasks done before mom came home. -
Dates to Remember
We all have dates we’ll always rememberOne of mine comes up in September
September 22 was the date that mom passed
The memory of her forever will last
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Work to be Free
Sitting in front of my computer screenTrees outside changing hue
Mindlessly working along
Wishing I were doing something new
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Fun Dad
“I want to be a fun dad,” my husband said.
His eyes sparkled
with tearful anticipation
as we worked to adopt our sons from Russia.
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Love of Springers
The love of a dog is a beautiful thingI’ve had many and they are so special in their own way.
One never replaces the other,
But fills the days with love and endless days of play
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Not Hard To Find
Home on MacArthur Drive The first time I left home was the first and the last. I graduated from high school in 1962, worked as a secretary for the Superintendent of Schools prior to graduation, and upon graduation, then in August of that year, I went to work for the next fifty-six years at the law office. I got engaged while a senior in high school and waited one year to regroup and got married in the summer of 1963.
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Freedom and Jesus
I always knew I would go to college. It was more than growing up, more than the next step…it was freedom!
Actually, I didn’t even know there was an option. It wasn’t until years later that I discovered that my dad didn’t really believe that I would go…and graduate. (I’m kinda glad that no one ever shared that little detail with me.)
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Naïve Decisions
Lake Monona When I turned seventeen, I was reeling from life in general. On Mother’s Day of 1966, my oldest sister passed away. Up until then, my life revolved around her care and helping my mom with her workload.
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Longing for College Life
The first time I moved away from home would be moving to college. I was so excited to make the move, I had planned out my entire dorm room before even getting home from my college tour. -
Wisdom from Mom
Life in my thirties presented a huge contrast to life in my twenties. I had married very young, divorced, rebounded into a second marriage, and divorced a second time all before I turned thirty. -
Cadaver Grafts and Karate Class
Bradley (age 10), Nathan (age 7) and I were all taking a karate class. I thought it would be a great way for the boys to learn some discipline and also burn off some extra energy. (which they had a lot of) Many days, it was a struggle to get them to class, but every once in a while, they enjoyed going. -
Strolling Thru My 30s
Reflecting back, my thirties were very busy and challenging, but all in all, good years. There were a few bumps in the road, such as job changes, purchasing a different home, and a miscarriage. My husband and I each had good jobs, we were both happy and healthy. We were parents of two girls ages five and 10 who were also happy and healthy. -
The Infertility Mountain
I turned 30 in 1994. Tom and I had moved to Sun Prairie to be closer to my family when we began having children of our own. Unfortunately, starting a family turned out to NOT be so straightforward. And that is the theme of my 30s…infertility.
“You have been assigned this mountain to show others it can be moved.” -Anonymous
Here is my “baby” Eli. Before Tom and I divorced, we separated for a while. Within days of him moving out, I bought a dog. We began trying to start our family when I was 27. We got divorced, childless, when I was 33. Then I married Craig when I was 35. More infertility work followed. We got Luka and Kadon from Russia in 2006, when I was 41.
It seemed like the goal to start/have a family colored every event of that decade. To say that my clock was ticking VERY LOUDLY is not overstating the facts. -
The Dragonfly Speaks to Me
Traditionally, we do not choose our spirit animal. Instead, it must choose us. Animals have often held a spiritual significance in our lives. Being aligned with specific animals is thought to exist throughout indigenous cultures. -
A Turtle’s Timid Transformation
I used http://www.spiritanimal.info to determine my spirit animal. The turtle was what I have been drawn to for years. I wear a bracelet every day with one on it. The turtle reminds me to take small, steady steps toward my goals.But apparently, my spirit animal can change. Who knew?
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The Call of the Wolf
My spirit animal is the WolfHaving taken a test to find out what my spirit animal is I was surprised to see it is the wolf. It is stated that these animals are actually very social, family-oriented, and good at communicating with each other. With the use of body movement, touch, eye contact, and vocal sounds, they engage with other wolves constantly.
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Always Landing On My Feet
I think my spirit animal is the cat.According to https://www.spiritanimal.info, the cat carries many meanings revolving around the balance between seemingly opposites, such as inner and outer, action and rest, and light and dark. It’s strongly symbolic of the connection with what usually hides in darkness or the unknown. The cat generally represents:
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The Creepy Black Moon
I lay in my bed mid-afternoon. The orange curtains made the softened sunlight somehow warmer. Bored, my eyelids would slowly close—a childhood naptime–the sweet stuff of adult memories.
But in the evening, the same room seemed sinister. The closet door hid unknown horrors. Under my bed lurked creatures just waiting for me to close my eyes so that they could come out and “get me”.
Even today, I remember the window, through which I could view the full moon.
I woke up one night and lay in the bed, dreading the idea of getting out and having my feet touch the floor. So I lay there. The only thing that protected me was the sheets and blankets that were pulled up tight under my chin. I felt safe, safer with the protection of the layers of cloth.
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Circus Trauma
Circus Nursery
I was 4 years old and had a beautiful circus-themed nursery. There was a handmade circus wagon on one side that my dad made special for me, complete with a canopy overhead. The circus wagon had cute stuffed animals on it of a lion, a tiger, and a bear, among others. On the opposite wall were pictures of those same sweet circus animals. Mom thought she had done such a great job making this cute, sweet nursery, but little did she know… -
Never Quite Enough
I have always wanted to be good, not necessarily the best, but just good at whatever I did. This especially was the case when I would participate in team sports. One of my fears as a child was when being chosen to play games and teams were needed I would never be chosen as one of the first few. This left me feeling bad that I didn’t have the ability or the reputation to be either the most popular or the best at a sport. Consequently, I always shied away from playing team sports. -
Missing Mom
It was chilly in my room. The snow was wisping in through three holes in the storm window and landing on the foot of my bed. I lay in bed and listened for the sounds of the radio or the sounds that mom normally was making in the kitchen. All I could hear was silence. -
The Easy Way Out
College Bound When I was seventeen, my oldest sister passed away. Life as I had always known it was gone forever. She had been the focus in my life for the past nine years.
Suddenly my family went back to life as normal. I didn’t really have a “normal”. My sister and her husband had bought a home and were raising their family. My Mom and Dad began to travel and enjoy each other’s company. I wasn’t sure where I fit in.
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Meant to Be?
Looking back at my life, what is the one decision that I would change if I could?Well, there is one thing that I wish I could do-over. By changing this one thing, my life would’ve taken an entirely different turn. Keep in mind, that I’m very happy with how things have turned out, but I do wonder how things would be different. -
For All the Right Reasons
I am supposed to write about decisions in my past that I would change. To be honest I feel that I have in reality made mostly the right decisions for myself.
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Making the Wrong Decision
There is a 1980 song called “Freewill” by Rush that spoke to my adolescent metaphysical angst about the meaning of life. The repeating snippet that has stuck in my soul since I was a High School sophomore is…
“You can choose a ready guide in some celestial voice.
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.”
I met my first husband, Tom, during the first week of my freshman year at college. He was tall and charismatic. The leader of his church student group, he seemed so sure of himself. Church leaders trusted him and were molding him to take a leadership role in the group. A confident musician, he sang and played guitar in the worship group during Sunday service. I saw him as talented, smart, and goal-driven. -
There Is Only One Me!
Three words that best describe me are snarky, persistent, and creative:
Snarky
I love to be snarky. Actually, it comes quite naturally. One of my favorite characters that I identify with is the cartoon character “Maxine”. She reminds me of how I think most of the time. Mix in a little more empathy and that is me. I am not a flowery speaking type of person. -
I Can Be Complicated
Three words to describe me would have to be a gross simplification! I can be a bit complicated! - I find myself to be extremely curious. When I’m at a staff meeting at work or talking to one of my friends, I often have questions about what has been discussed or communicated. I find myself to be very curious about the purpose or meaning of what was said.
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She Thought She Could, So She Did!
Trying to use 3 words to describe myself is no easy feat. Do I want to use positive or negative words? I’m currently working on my positive self-talk, so I think I need to focus on the kinder words. I had to resort to asking the family for words that described me and here is what they came up with. -
You Can Do It!
What are three words that describe me…? When you’re working on legacy writing, sometimes you want people to know how awesome you are! Come on, you can do it!!!
For this topic, the Sidetracked Sisters each prepared by thinking of words to describe the others. I even asked my daughter Aubrey to add a word for everyone. Then, when we got together to write, each of us didn’t have to be digging around for defining words, we could just sort, accept, or reject words that were chosen for us.
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Shame on You
Worry, shame, suffering, depression, regret…sucky emotions that I try to avoid in my life at all costs.
A Wise old woman was talking to a girl and said,
“There are two wolves always fighting inside me.
One is filled with anger, hate, jealousy, shame, and lies.
The other wolf is filled with love, joy, truth, and peace.
This battle rages inside of you and all people.”
The girl thought for a moment and asked,
“Which wolf will win?”
The Wise old woman answered,
“The one you feed.”
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Losing Loved Ones
In contemplating what my greatest fear is, I’d have to say it’s the fear of loss. The idea of losing a member of my family is unbearable to me. Whether it’s my sister, my mom or dad, my aunt, any of my kids, or any of my family, the thought brings me to tears. -
Lost Souls in Frames
It is hard to focus on just one of my greatest fears. It seems I have several. But to minimize them here is the first one: I am, and have been terrified of being in an auto accident and dying from the result. This has gone on for as long as I can remember. When I was younger I would actually decline going out of town, especially when my husband was driving, as I was terrified of getting killed in an auto accident. I overcame it for a while, but I must say I think being more aware of my mortality at this time, it has come back to haunt me. -
Storms, Heights, and Aging. Oh My!
When I think about my greatest fear, I have a variety of fears to choose from. I’ve always been terrified of storms. -
Money Will Take Care of Itself
Money is a loaded topic to me. When I was younger, I never really gave money too much of a thought. We always seemed to have enough money to do the things I wanted to do and buy the things I wanted to buy. I had no reason to feel deprived by a lack of money. -
Too Much Money?
To me, money is a “means to an end. It definitely tends to rule the world. It seems everything is about having money, earning money, wanting money, or not having enough money. Can you ever have enough money? It seems not so. -
Piggy Bank Love
I loved my piggy bank. When I was 6 years old, I would pull the plastic plug out of her belly and dump the pennies, nickels, dimes, and quarters out onto my bed. Next, I would sort the coins into piles. Then I would organize the piles into smaller groups of 100 cents. I felt rich.
As a 12-year-old, my mom would give me spending money for our yearly family vacation. During the week-long camping trip at Jellystone Campground, I had the opportunity to go mini-golfing and to spend my money on treats and souvenirs. It felt so powerful to have the choice to buy as much ice cream as I wanted–or not. I would walk around the camp store every day admiring the mugs, keychains, and refrigerator magnets. I could buy any of these things. But I didn’t. Instead, I always counted my leftover money at the end of the week and added it to my piggy bank. I felt rich. -
The Love of Money is the Root of All Evil
When I was a little girl, I didn’t think much about money. I received a small allowance which went into my piggy bank. From time to time, Mom would take me to the bank to deposit my money. I enjoyed watching my savings grow and to be honest, I don’t remember what I used it for. Each birthday and Christmas, I would receive money from my relatives and it was earmarked for the savings account. -
My Bucket List in Retrospect
One of the things to do today is to compose a bucket list. Perhaps I have a very simple mind or am very satisfied with my life but as I start this writing, I don’t have one. Perhaps, I could write down my list in retrospect. Maybe because I’m one of the older Sidetracked Sisters, I have already accomplished some of the items that would be on my “Bucket List”. -
The Bucket List: Fill, Empty, and Repeat
I’ve always believed in goals, dreams, and bucket lists. But that doesn’t mean that they are easy for me.
Back in college, I spent the summer of 1985 in Washington DC at a church Youth Leadership Training Conference. Everyone worked full-time and attended activities and training in the evenings and on weekends.
During one of the first trainings, we were encouraged to have daily “quiet time” when we were supposed to read the Bible and pray. One of the goals of this activity was to gain clarity on our life goals.
Unfortunately, God did not reach his gaze down and bestow this wisdom upon me.
I knew that I wanted to finish my degree, get married, and have 13 children. This sounded pretty godly and was approved–as long as I looked to and depended upon my future husband as my head and leader.
Yeah. Right.
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The Hardest Choices
Life is full of change, challenges, and choices. School, college, what am I going to be when I grow up, finding a life partner, divorce, infertility, adoption, work drama, relationship drama, health drama… the list goes on.
Most challenges come and we muddle through to the best of our ability. We don’t see the challenge of a health scare coming, but we rally our resources to research and battle the event.Our kids challenge us with choices and behaviors that we tackle on a regular basis. We talk to their teachers and go on long car rides and try to talk some sense in an effort to guide a nearly adult teen to make “good” decisions.
But the hardest challenges are those we choose. No medical diagnosis or call from the police to knock us back on our heels and force change. The challenge that I’ve struggled with over the years has always been “What am I going to be when I grow up?”
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Protected: Divorce is the First Step
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It Should’ve Been Me
My oldest sister was my idol. I didn’t look at her as a role model because she set the bar too high. -
Who Do You Think You Are?
The best advice I’ve ever given is this: Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken and if people don’t like you, that is ok. -
Center of the Universe
“Who died and made you the center of the universe? Everything that people choose to do does not revolve around you. Frankly, people do as they must.” -
Turn it OFF!!
*Screen time is time spent watching TV, using the computer, and cell phone.
*Research shows that the average household has more televisions than people and has them on for more than 8 hours per day.
*Adults average about 8.5 hours of screen time per day.
*Aim for no more than 2 hours of screen time per day outside of work.
Image from Shel Silverstein’s poem “Jimmy Jet and His TV Set Back in the early 2000s, we would sponsor something called “TV turn-off” at the school where I taught. We would encourage families to commit to one week where households wouldn’t turn on their TVs. Probably 20% of the families participated or tried to anyway.
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Words of Wisdom x 4
I am not one to take advice, but throughout my life, I have actually been given some good pieces of wisdom and I actually took them.
One of the most memorable pieces of advice I was given was from my Dad. I was a teenager and having trouble with my boyfriend, now husband. We were on the phone and I anticipated him cheating on me. -
Snakes, and Piggies, and Dragons…Oh, My
It was spring, 1971. I was in First Grade. We actually had a long enough lunchtime that students could go home mid-day to eat before returning for afternoon classes.
On this sunny, noontime, I was crossing the mowed lot adjacent to our home. Walking through the low-cut weeks, I saw a couple of little garter snakes slithering away from my feet. I quickly grabbed one in each hand and brought them home. Going into the house through the garage, I saw a big cardboard box sitting on the garbage cans. A perfect spot to save my snakes for later! -
Hamsters, Uncle Lloyd and Simple Math
I had been telling everyone in my family for months that I wanted a pair of hamsters. Dad said no. Mom said no and I was frustrated. I was ten years old and I was fascinated by hamsters. -
My Houdini Hamster
Over the years I’ve had a slew of pets including dogs, fish, hamsters, birds, salamanders, crayfish, and cats. My first bird was a yellow parakeet with red eyes that I named Buttercup and my first hamster was a white albino teddy bear hamster (but I don’t remember it’s name).
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And Then There Was Oliver
When I was living at home we had a variety of pets. This included dogs, turtles, fish, chameleons, frogs, hamsters, and birds. -
One Way to Learn to Drive!
One way to learn to drive is just, “Do it”. What I mean by that is the following:
1957 Plymouth I was fifteen, not even old enough to have a driver’s license. If you can remember way back to 1959 or so, I was sitting close to my boyfriend, now husband, a/k/a Art. You see, in those days there was no consul to separate the seats. We were in the country, him driving with his arm around my shoulders, and me, of course, snuggling up close to him, as was the usual position for a boyfriend and girlfriend. He was handling the gas, I was to handle the steering.
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No Worries
It was June 1981. I was more excited than nervous. The next day, I was going to the Department of Motor Vehicles for the road test for my driver’s permit. It was dark out when dad and I drove out of town to the DMV to practice the skills I would be demonstrating the next day. I pulled out of the parking lot at the same time that people were entering the local racetrack for an event. Traffic was heavy for our small rural town. I took a left onto the highway and was unaware of the cars around me. I turned into the far lane, instead of the closest lane. Within one minute of my practice, I had shown my dad that I was NOT ready to drive the family care independently and safely. -
Late Bloomer
1957 Oldsmobile I was a late bloomer. When I was in High School, everyone was chomping at the bit to learn to drive and to get their licenses. I’ve always been a late bloomer. I knew Dad wouldn’t let me drive his car and I didn’t have another car to drive so I was in no hurry to learn.
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Drive Me Home
When I first was learning to drive, I remember that mom was at work, so Lisa got the privilege of taking me to the DMV for my temps. After I left the building, Lisa threw me the keys and said “Ok – drive me home.” -
New Year’s Resolutions or Not?
Making New Year’s Resolutions has never played an important part in my life. I find that sometimes putting down words of actions to take can cause me to not take action. I would rather celebrate last year’s successes which are done and in the “can”. They were thought about, acted on, and completed. -
Sidetracked Legacies
Now that I’ve left teaching (and my kids are back at school (no more Covid shutdowns–I hope) I am in the process of reinventing my life.
Specifically, I’m working on developing a new career plan…and that begins with strategic daily routines and new avenues to create and contribute. One new addition to my life is something called “Sidetracked Legacies”.My morning starts with getting up, putting on my exercise clothes, and spending a few minutes with my kids before they head off to school. Then I head out for a “momma jog” with the pups, Stella and Evie. I use this time to listen to podcasts. The two that I regularly tap into lately are “The Life Coach School” by Brooke Castillo and “Don’t Keep Your Day Job” by Cathy Heller. These are timely and interesting since I’m on the road to becoming a certified life coach and launching my own podcasts…soon! They hit me right where I’m at.
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Talking to Yourself
Last week, half of the sisters were out of town, so Lisa and I met one on one. These are rare occasions since we both have commitments that keep us very busy and out of trouble. I was thinking about how pleasant our visit was and then I got sidetracked (surprise, surprise).I realized as I thought back, that during our visit, I was sending myself very negative messages about guess who? ME. I have a wonderful relationship with my husband, my son, my sister and her husband, my nieces and their families, and my stepdaughter and her family. Sadly, the worst relationship I have seems to be with myself.
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Faith
Where do you do church?
How should a church look?
These seem to be two very controversial questions lately. Especially after COVID, where we have all been confined to our homes, apartments, (or wherever we might have the fortune or misfortune to find ourselves)…spiritual practice rules are up for debate. -
Think and Grow What???
I recently reread the 1937 version of Napoleon Hills’ “Think and Grow Rich”. Mr. Hill opens his first chapter with the phrase “Thoughts are Things”. He goes on to say that when we mix our thoughts with purpose, persistence, and a burning desire for their translation into riches or other material objects, these thoughts have the power to create what we are desirous of. Wow. That’s quite a statement.
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Share the Love
In our neighborhood, there is a person who lives at the corner who hangs dog treats on the bushes next to the sidewalk. A small sign tells dog walkers to “Please take one.”
She is putting a little love out into the world.
The other day, I saw a woman in the grocery checkout line who was wearing a dress identical to one that I own. I thought that it looked nice on her. A few minutes later, as I was driving out of the parking lot, I saw the same woman. She was walking to her car with her shopping cart. I rolled down my window and hollered “Hey, I just wanted to tell you how great you look in that dress. I have the same one at home and I love it.” She replied, “Thanks, I got it on sale at Kohls.” I answered back, “Yeah, I even wear it just like you do, with leggings and a jacket”.
Just putting a little love out into the world.
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How to Deal with Impatience and Not Go Crazy
Lately, I find that I have absolutely no patience with the people and things around me. I’m sure my family will say that I’m always like that, but I think it’s been getting worse. Yesterday, I found myself slamming my phone down on my desk simply because the screen would go into sleep mode too soon. Today, I feel like I’m just trying to pick a fight with anyone that crosses my path. Even as I sit here writing this, I can hear the person across the table from me crunching on food and it’s making me feel crazy. -
Voiceless Woman
I remember driving with my mom in the passenger seat. I might comment on a pretty house. She answered me with silence.
When I asked my mom for her opinion on how a new dress looked on me, she would reply with “I wonder what it would look like on me?” She wouldn’t answer my question.
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Be True To Yourself
While we are all trying to improve ourselves and make the most out of our lives, one thing that we must keep in mind is to be true to yourself. Following what society expects or desires you to be or to look like or to accomplish does nothing for you if you don’t agree with those expectations. All you end up doing is frustrating yourself. Here are 5 things to consider when trying to fit into society’s expectations and also be true to yourself. -
To Meditate or NOT to Meditate
Meditation is supposed to be a wonderful way to relax, come to terms with your inner self, help relax your body, help your mind focus, blah, blah, blah.
Well, you know what? I have found meditation to be a huge waste of time. I have tried, really, I have tried!
Come on inner peace…I don’t have all day! (I know people around me would sa I HAVEN’T really tried,(see here) but that is just not true.)
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Helping Your College Student with Homesickness
When my youngest kid left for college this past fall, we went through some significant homesickness. She has always been my “velcro” kid and loves to be home and a part of things. There were a lot of tears and feelings of “I don’t want to go” happening. As a parent that likes to always see her kids happy – this broke my heart. I didn’t know how to help – so I resorted to the Internet to guide me in what to do. After reading a few posts – I decided on my own methods.
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The Emotional Bank Account
When I was growing up, I always thought relationships had to be 50/50. Give and take needed to be equal or the relationship would not succeed. In reality, what I discovered was that relationships almost always consist of an unequal number of contributions. If one person is having a great day, they might contribute 80%. If the other person was having a bad day or a troublesome day, their contribution might only be 20% or less. The goal was to have the total equal to 100%. Unfortunately, that didn’t always happen.
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Halloween Is Not Just For Kids! – Enjoy Yourself!
Who thinks that Halloween is strictly for kids. I have noticed that a lot of adults sure know how to enjoy themselves. I have had a couple of fun memories that still make me laugh about Halloween! -
Is It Time to Jump Ship?
How do you know when it is time to leave…
to retire…
to change jobs…
to jump ship and switch careers?
Maybe you are looking for an “aha” moment to point you in the right direction.
A signal that shows it. is. time…
I am a teacher. I have been a teacher for more than 20 years. I’ve always known that my passion is dreaming…learning…
teaching.
That was until the beginning of November 2015.
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The Innocence of Youth
Mom and I went out the door hand in hand and headed to the bus stop. Mom didn’t drive when we were little so the two of us did our weekly trek to catch the bus for downtown. We would do our errands and then do our grocery shopping and finally take a taxi home with our treasures and groceries.
Three-year-old me ran up the steps and found a seat for us near the front of the bus. Most of the people that rode the bus back in the day knew each other. This day there was a man that was unfamiliar. Something was a bit different about him. I tried to whisper to Mom but my voice came out a bit loud. I asked how come that man had such a dirty face. She shushed me but too late. The man had heard my question. He told me that his skin was a different color than mine. I asked him why and he answered that he was born that way. He asked Mom if I wanted to touch his skin. She quietly declined and I climbed up in her lap. -
How Do I Love Thee – Let Me Count The Ways…
What do I love about myself is the question of the day. It’s a challenging question to answer because people tend to focus more on the negative aspects of themselves. I’m choosing to try to be more positive, so I’m actually having a hard time picking just one thing. That will most likely sound conceited to some. Here are a few things that I’m proud of about myself. -
50th Birthday – Setting Goals for the Year
OMG – this year will mark my 50th birthday. Thinking about this has brought to mind some things that need to change and some goals I need to achieve. I’m currently single, overweight, and will soon have no kids at home. It’ll be just me and the animals. Do I want to spend the next part of my life in the same way that I’ve been living? -
My Latest “AHA” Moment
Hhhmmm… I sat down at my desk and opened my daily calendar. Suddenly it hit me. Today is April 4, 2019, and I am turning 70 years old. Most of the people I know, who are my age, seem to have their act together. Several friends own lovely cabins up North. People I graduated from High School with have substantial pensions and retirement funds. Others have retired and are traveling and seeing the world. I always thought I would be enjoying these things too. Instead, I was still working at the bank and as much as I enjoyed helping others reach their goals, working at the bank was no longer one of mine.
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Retirement Reality
My aha moment came many weeks, months, after my retirement last year. I realized it after 56 years of working as a paralegal/legal secretary for the same firm my boss retired and the office closed. It is hard to break old habits, like cleaning at night and on weekends, never having any free time without feeling guilty, and being able to have some free time for myself. My aha moment came when one day many months later I realized, while I was on a road trip with a friend, that I didn’t have any real-time constraints other than my family needing me to come back for things such as cleaning, cooking, driving grandkids around, you know, the usual. We were driving along and I thought aha, I am on my own at this moment and don’t have to go to work. No one was expecting me to get out a will, do divorce papers, real estate documents, correspondence, and the list goes on. -
I Love Me – I Love Me Not!
What is something I love about myself? And Why? Good grief. When someone asks me a question like this, my first response is “I have absolutely no idea”. Then when I get quiet and dig deeper, I find a thing or two. -
That Reminds Me…
What does it mean if I can’t tell a joke? I can’t even remember a joke. I only know one joke aficionado who, when he tells a joke, I impatiently wait for the end and try (often unsuccessfully) to NOT roll my eyes.
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Have you heard any good ones lately?
“Have you heard the one about…?” You hear that phrase as someone passes and if you’re like me, you want to hear the rest of the story, all the way to the punch line. -
Stupid Jokes – I can never remember them anyway!
Stupid Jokes – I can never remember them anyway!O.K. there are a lot of jokes out there that are funny I must admit. I happen to have a significant other, a/k/a husband, who loves to tell jokes. How he remembers so many is beyond me. I hear a joke which I actually feel I should share and, of course, I can’t remember the stupid joke.
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Damn! I’m FUNNY!!
“Rectum? Damn near killed him!” – “Liquor? I hardly know her!”These are my two favorite jokes – or rather punch lines to jokes. I don’t know where I first heard either of these or what the actual jokes are, but I find both so funny. I don’t care how often I say them – they always make me chuckle. After years of hearing these over and over, my kids just roll their eyes and tell me I’m not very funny.
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Lazy or Just Inadequate?
Am I lazy or just inadequate?? I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Both in my personal life and my work life. In my work life, I’ve said for years that I want to get back to my computer programming/development skills. I have all the tools I need to refresh this information in my head, so why don’t I accomplish this? What is holding me back from accomplishing this goal?
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I Was Born a Pleaser
Somehow, in life, I was born a pleaser.
I was the youngest of three girls and I quickly learned how to act so that my sisters would be pleased with me. The other side of this spinning coin is, I have often been devastated when someone close to me says mean things to or about me. I can never understand why they would want to be hurtful. This results in me wanting to do something or try something, but being held back by the abuse I allow myself to suffer in the opinions of others. -
Where Does the Time Go?
Where does the time go?
Some of us are working hard, head down, getting stuff done…others, not so much. -
Does Your Talk Match Your Walk?
Do I walk my talk? Do I follow through? Do my actions match my words? Do I do as I say? Sadly, in many cases, I would have to say NO…I feel kind of creepy admitting that because my intentions are always good. If I get down right honest, I often think out loud. I try out ideas like I try on clothes. When I speak my words and I look for reactions. My need to please is strong, so if the reactions to my thoughts out loud are too severe, I may go another direction. -
Practice What You Preach
I feel I definitely practice what I preach most of the time. For years and years, I’ve said I wanted a cottage on a lake. Now, it wasn’t just any lake or just any area, but I wanted it to be on South Lake Michigan Drive in Door County, WI, on Lake Michigan.
I always knew I was going to do this. We didn’t know how, didn’t know when, but it was going to happen. It had to. I put pictures up at work, constantly looked at the availability of properties and there was nothing… especially in our price range.
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Too Much Profanity!
I wish kids today (including my own) wouldn’t use profanity as much as they do. I really feel that there are so many more productive ways to express oneself other than swearing. This is something I strongly believe, BUT…. do I follow thru myself? Not so much.
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Be Careful Of What You Say Out Loud – Do Your Actions Match Your Words?
Do my actions match my words?
They DO. But…I’m very careful about what I say out loud. There’s a certain power that dreams–shared and spoken aloud–have in my life. A few of my biggies have been completing my master’s degree, adopting my kids, running a marathon. I committed and then took small, methodical steps to work toward the goal. I am slow and steady. I believe in planning your work and working your plan.
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Respect My Time & Effort, Please!
When someone asks me to do something, I take pride in doing what was asked and doing it well. Sometimes I do research, look up procedures and spend time planning out the best way to complete the task. I finish the project or the document or the job and go back to the person that made the request pleased that I have accomplished my goal only to hear… -
Stupid Questions
I have lots of pet peeves, but I’d have to say my biggest one is stupid people. You know those ones that ask the dumbest questions? Or the ones that ask things that really don’t need to be asked?I can resonate so much with the comedian Bill Engvall when he does his skit stating “Here’s your sign!” With the implication that you need to hold a sign saying “I’M STUPID”
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Brainless Internet Surfing
I used to be so proud of myself. When others would tell about vegging in front of the tv or watching a movie marathon all weekend, I would feel the smug self-satisfaction of accomplishment. I prided myself on creating artsy stuff, crafts, and steadily remodeling my home.
That. Was. Then.
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Biggest Pet Peeve – Aubrey
I really don’t get pet peeves. I mean, why do you call it a pet peeve? Can’t you call it something simpler? Plus, there’s “pet” in pet peeves…is there something wrong with pets? Why don’t you just call it “annoying”. Because isn’t that what pet peeves are? But I guess, it’s just a way that people express themselves. But I’m just going to call it ANNOYING.
#sidetrackedsisters #sidetrackedaubrey #sanity #mindset #thoughts #petpeeves
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So Many Pet Peeves
One of my pet peeves is when people say, “Hi, how are you?”, and really don’t care or want to hear about you anyway.Pet Peeve #2: Husbands with toys. Why is it they complain about your “stuff” sitting around or hanging on walls, but feel there is nothing wrong with their things, such as trailers, sitting out in the driveway 24/7?
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Permission to Avoid Fear
In the day it was felt that if you didn’t meet all of your dreams, goals, were in your job of your dreams, be successful (whatever that meant” where you wanted to be at the ripe old age of thirty, you were, I guess, “A Failure”. That was for a rather short period of time on my part as I just couldn’t accept that. My Dad changed jobs in his fifties and wished he had done it long before that. So, I decided screw that Idea, just keep forging on and as long as you are happy that is a success. -
A Leap of Faith
I remember the feeling like it was yesterday. It was spring break 2006. Our home in Wisconsin had finally sold and our son and I had driven back from Colorado to take the final treasures out of the house. We had lived there for 15 years. My Mom had passed away in that house. So many wonderful family memories had been made there. -
Bad High School Memories
High school. Do you have good memories or bad ones of that time in your life? Many of mine are good, but I always had the feeling that I wasn’t good enough, I felt excluded by people and I was always worried about what others thought of me.
There was the “cool” crowd and the only time I was a part of it, was when one of the crowd would invite me to join. When she didn’t invite me – then I wasn’t included.
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Fears Equal Limitations
I hate the feeling of falling. The gentle decent of a Ferris wheel is a one. Jumping off a bridge with friends into the rushing water of the river below is an eight. Falling out of an airplane at 14,000 feet is a ten. I have done all three. Why???
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Stranger Danger
Unfortunately, I have had several. The one that always comes to my mind is when It was in Junior High, n/k/a Middle school. I was in band and we had band practice at night. -
A Safe Place to Land
Does everyone have a story where they “threatened” a parent with running away and the parent in response helped her pack for the trip? I’ve heard many. The retelling sounds so cute and makes the listeners nod with appreciation, connection, and approval of the parent’s wise response and predictable outcome—that of a short journey around the block or across the street to a friend’s house. -
My Scariest Moment – Aubrey
This is why I hate dolls.Ok, I’m going to start off a way long time ago when I was little, like 3 or 2. (I’m 9 now) I loved to spend lots of time with my cousin Nate – I still love spending time with him.
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Missing Child
Bradley was 1.5 years old and I had to go to the store to return a pair of pants. I figured while we were there, we would take his annual Christmas picture. All went fine during the picture, so it was time to return the pants.We went to JCPenney’s and I started the return process. I smiled down at Bradley and then looked at the clerk to tell her what I needed to do. I then looked down at Bradley and, to my horror, he was gone. I glanced around, thinking he had just started to wander. He was nowhere to be seen.
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Driving in the Fog
I’ve always used the metaphor of “driving in the fog” as a way to go as far as you can see and then you’ll see farther, or what’s next?The drive from Waterloo, Iowa to Beaver Dam, Wi could often be full of foggy sections or just plain socked in with fog. My ex-husband was famous for driving too fast, no matter what the weather was doing. We would often argue about “Please slow down” or “Look out for the curves in the road!!”
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Procrastination is My Middle Name
I am the queen of procrastination. I have a saying that I post at the office that says “Success is doing the things that we procrastinate doing in a timely fashion”.I always seem to be able accomplish quite a few things when I am under stress, but as I get older, I find that procrastinating for a period of time only puts me in a very stressful straight of mind.