I lay in my bed mid-afternoon. The orange curtains made the softened sunlight somehow warmer. Bored, my eyelids would slowly close—a childhood naptime–the sweet stuff of adult memories.
But in the evening, the same room seemed sinister. The closet door hid unknown horrors. Under my bed lurked creatures just waiting for me to close my eyes so that they could come out and “get me”.
Even today, I remember the window, through which I could view the full moon.
I woke up one night and lay in the bed, dreading the idea of getting out and having my feet touch the floor. So I lay there. The only thing that protected me was the sheets and blankets that were pulled up tight under my chin. I felt safe, safer with the protection of the layers of cloth.
I looked at the window where the moon could often be seen. Instead, a dark circle rose from below the window sill and was framed in the night. I remember thinking how strange that image was and how wrong the color was. It didn’t instill fear, just confusion. But I had my sheets and blanket tucked tight under my chin so whatever was holding that dark circle in front of my window couldn’t get me!
This scenario maybe seems rather unexciting in terms of childhood fears. Today’s kids have grown up with “Five Nights at Freddy’s” and innumerable horror movies.
But I’ve never been one to watch scary movies. I learned the hard way, when in my early teens. The vividness of my imagination, especially while washing my face in the shower, makes it impossible for me to view movies and leave the images alone. Instead, I replay the knife-wielding killer waiting outside the shower or the demon-possessed teenager crawling on the ceiling. I can’t let go of the creepy feeling of evil.
I’d much rather have thoughts of peace, happiness, and calm. There is enough trauma and hurt in the world. I really don’t want to invite repeated images of that negativity into my psyche. I’m just too impressionable, I guess.
Some people love roller coasters, scary movies, and haunted houses. Yeah…not me. I’m much more a kayaking-at-dawn, rom-com with popcorn, and HGTV kind of girl.
And the moon?
I’ve never seen a black one since that one night.