“I want to be a fun dad,” my husband said.
His eyes sparkled
with tearful anticipation
as we worked to adopt our sons from Russia.
I imagine that this is a common expectation,
the hope of prospective parents.
Sweet baby kisses, swaddled infants peacefully sleeping, snuggles, alert in a stroller,
grandma smiling proudly at the two of you.
Imagining catching that first fish together,
coaching his football team,
taking off the training wheels,
and helping him get his driver’s license…
But,
during infancy, sleep is at a premium.
Infants cry for no reason, the stinky diapers pile up, rocking, bouncing, no “me” time.
Then,
School years and homework and school visits.
Teachers have concerns.
A child gets extra help for academics,
but how do you handle the unpredictable behavior issues?
Put your clean clothes in the closet.
Don’t hold your fork like a shovel.
Read “Charlotte’s Web” and “Captain Underpants” together.
Turn in your math homework.
Make good choices when it comes to friends.
Its a parent’s job to teach respect, responsibility…
if they don’t, no one will.
You want to go on fishing trips, the waterpark,
ride go carts…
but won’t that be a reward for “bad” behavior?
You hope the talks, the consequences, the relationship,
the counselors, the therapists, the police officers
penetrate.
And,
just when you think he’s maturing,
there is another event that makes you question everything.
“I want to be a fun dad,”
our son says before the birth of
his son.
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I can’t wait for my son to arrive thanks mom and dad for all the support