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A Secret From Dad
I always wanted to learn to swim. For some reason, my dad repeatedly intervened and said no. It was very frustrating. Finally, I went to Mom and asked what was up with Dad. She told me the secret. Dad was afraid of water. -
Dusty Dreams and Ukulele Strings
My ex-husband, Tom, played the guitar. He began playing after High School–taught himself. He was a natural musician as was his father. Going into college, he was a music major. Vocal jazz was his passion. But the thing that is important here is that he began taking finger-picking lessons when he was in his late 20s. This whole idea was absolutely foreign to me. He was a grown-ass adult, an accountant who just loved to play guitar. He didn’t even play in the band at church anymore. But he wanted the routine, the commitment, and the accountability that taking lessons from a guitar teacher gave him.
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Let Me Google That
I’m trying to think of something that I’ve always wanted to learn how to do and I’m not coming up with anything. Throughout my life, if there was something that interested me enough, I managed to figure out how to do it. I was never the type to just leave the topic alone if it was important enough.
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Building Confidence
The topic of “What is something you always wanted to learn how to do?” brings up a whole boatload of ideas. T thought I wanted to write about my desire to be someone who could build things or even go so far as becoming a contractor. For example today, I was looking at the four tiers of spices sitting on my cupboard. -
You Can’t March With a Piano
I have always wanted to learn to play the piano. From the time I was little, I thought this would be fun and something I would enjoy all my life. At my grandma’s house in Black Earth, she had a piano player. My dad would sit at it and play “The Wild Irish Rose” and The Old Rugged Cross”. I don’t remember having the opportunity to play this piano as we were kids and it was thought that we might break something or whatever. Probably our plunking would just annoy everyone. -
Always Moving Forward
If you could be any age, what would you pick?
Isn’t this such a “writer’s group” question? Well yeah. We sat down to get into it and discovered that you could look at the topic from a dozen different angles. Here are three alternatives that immediately popped into my head:
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Easier Said Than Done
Simplifying my life now would take some heavy-duty work. I have no concerns about wanting to eliminate people from my life. There is not one person in my family or among my friends that I would want to live without. -
Simple As It Gets
When asked how I would simplify my life, I first need to think about the things that make it more complicated. After identifying those items, I need to decide what the benefit is to changing that aspect. -
Simplifying is Boring and Overrated
How would I simplify my life?I always feel that it would be a benefit to my sanity to simplify my life. But, in reality, I don’t think I could handle or enjoy my chaotic life any other way.
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OCD – Obsessive Collecting Disorder
I am obsessed with collecting items, especially when they are part of a set. I’m not sure where this obsession came from, but as an adult, it has definitely taken hold. -
The Occasional Collector
I am not a huge fan of collections. If I think hard, I can come up with three groups of items I have collected.
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Butterflies and Blue Santas
Does everybody have a favorite collection? As I was growing creating a collection seemed to be a way of getting a child to have something constructive to do. Today, of course, we know that most of our children don’t even think about collecting anything as they are too busy with their phones or video games. -
My Chaotic and Messy Life
I like the idea of clean, simple, fresh, and uncluttered. Not chaotic and messy…I follow “The Minimalists” on FB, watch reels about decluttering, and notice the sparse backgrounds in my favorite podcast videos.
A simple life beckons, but (and this is a big BUT) that isn’t how I actually live my life. Let me give you just a few thoughts that come to mind…
Work
I am a Life Coach, writer, and podcaster. I am constantly struggling to create systems to organize my content and my work. This is important so that I don’t miss things like appointments for interviews and deadlines for posts. However, as I sit at my desk, I note that it has inexplicably fallen into disarray. Stuff, unnecessary stuff, I’ve accumulated has grown roots. So instead, I grab my computer and notebook and work on the couch in the living room.
Home
When I was a teenager, I loved going to a friend’s house that had 5 children. I loved going to my boyfriend’s house where the family room was always filled with people watching football on TV. The activity of people was energizing.
My home growing up was calm and quiet. Mom cooking “Hamburger Helper” in the kitchen. In the summer, she planted dozens of annual flowers out in the gardens around the house and tended the landscaping around the yard. Dad relaxing in his tweed Lay-Z-Boy watching “Gunsmoke” or tinkering on some project in his basement workshop. My younger sister at a friend’s house playing Barbies. This was home base…the place that was stable and secure.
Grandma’s House
I would go to her house most days after school and during the days in the summer. Thinking of the couple hours I spent with her after school, I can smell bean soup simmering on the stove. Michelle and I enjoyed a snack after school before sitting on the floor and leaning against the big, round Naugahyde ottoman to enjoy uninterrupted episodes of Gilligan’s Island, The Brady Bunch, Zoom, and Hogan’s Heros. On long, hot, summer days I can still hear the distant drone of a neighbor mowing grass and the whine of cicadas in the mature Norway Maple that shaded the yard.There was a predictability in Grandma’s routine as she daily filed and and painted her perfect red nails. The hair comb was always in its spot between the two organizers in the drawer to the right of the sink.
Now
As an adult and parent, I’ve tried to create the calm consistency in my own home that I didn’t appreciate from my youth. Our house has space for people to watch TV out of earshot of others. During the school year, there is a predictability of family dinners and bedtime routines. In the summer I enjoy reading out on the screened porch overlooking my gardens and the sound of waves against our shoreline.But I’m most happy when the silence is interrupted by Kadon and Aubrey rough-housing and laughing upstairs. I love walking in the front door and seeing my son and his wife cooking in the kitchen. It doesn’t get any better than having my grandson, in his “ExerSaucer”, turn and squeal as I walk into the room.
Maybe this life isn’t exactly unrestrained messiness and overwhelming chaos…
…it’s also definitely not the quiet of a lonely, uneventful home.
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Girl Scout Adventure
Summer of 1978 at William’s Woods When I was in elementary school, I learned that the local Girl Sout troup went camping in the summer.
Sign me up!
I belonged to our local troop which met at a building near where I lived. It was called “The Girl Scout House”. The building consisted of one large open room upstairs and another twin room downstairs. Our group me upstairs. There was a big fireplace along one wall that was never used. Several long garage sale tables and metal folding chairs were the only furnishings.
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Dad’s Favorite Word – NO
During my childhood, I don’t think the word Yes was even invented. My dad was a salesman during all of my growing-up years. He was the head of the household even though he was not home most of the time. This required any decision-making events to be put on hold upon his return from work. Now, you couldn’t just say “Hi Dad” and pop the question which would require a simple yes or no answer. No, you had to work with due diligence and with a lot of savvy on how to handle a man that didn’t know the word yes. -
No Cookies at my House
It seems like it’s always easier for a parent or a babysitter to say NO to any request from a child. I’ve often wondered why.When I was little, my neighborhood friends and I would play outside and occasionally would go to someone’s house and say we were hungry. We asked to come in and have a snack. The moms always said NO. Sometimes they would hand us a cookie each and send us outside to enjoy it.
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The Downside of Yes
For a long time, as a parent, my first reaction when one of the kids asked me if they could do something was to say “No”. I usually had that reaction because I was concerned about them making a mess that I’d have the clean up or I was worried about them doing something to make someone else angry or other such nonsense. -
Sleeping with the Bridesmaids
This story is on a hearsay basis. In other words, I wasn’t there, but have had this story told to me several times and I think it is pretty funny and is one of my favorites for this family. -
Caught Naked
Have you ever seen a family member naked that you shouldn’t be seeing or didn’t want to be seeing? Well, our family has a habit of seeing the wrong people naked and at inopportune times. Over the years, there have been multiple instances of this. -
Bad Grandma
I always say that since I have become a grandma I seem to constantly be in trouble, or at least get blamed for some happening that the kids get me involved in.I have a rather rambunctious, curious grandson who has always kept everyone on their toes. He is sweet, fun-loving, and as I said, curious and adventuresome.
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Smoking with the Cool Girls
Being a little sister is not always easy. Whenever Sandy and her girlfriends were trying things out, I wanted to try them too.As is often the case, when I was going through this experience, it wasn’t funny. With every telling, it gets funnier and funnier. And now, it is downright hysterical.
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Who Needs Backup Sensors Anyway?
I’ve never been known as an awesome driver. As a matter of fact, I’ve been teased relentlessly over the years for developing ADD tendencies while behind the wheel.
This propensity to ADD while driving has its drawbacks. But sometimes I get into trouble even when I’m clearly 100% focused. like. when…backing up.
“Protective” Barriers
Most recently, I had a day job driving a forklift. I loaded freight onto a pallet and moved said freight to a staging area. On one fateful day, I had a “big and bulky” load of only 2 items. I was “looking alertly in the direction of movement with my body appropriately having 4 points of contact with the lift and using a wide-legged supported stance” as I maneuvered my pallet into the lane. Unfortunately, the load of boxes was blocking my ability to see the barrier rod that prevented people from entering a conveyor area. -
Not a Prima Ballerina
I started my dance “career” at age 4 by taking tap classes. I believe Mom initially got me into classes to help me overcome my shyness. Hiding under Grandma Is’s skirt was where you’d find me if anyone tried talking to me during our errands.Now when it came time to be in dance class, my shyness disappeared. I loved being the leader of our class and getting to be the first one onto the stage during the recital. I never recall having stage fright or freezing while on stage. That never occurred to me.
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Meal Prep to the Rescue
My family doesn’t have a “favorite meal” because we have too many different tastes to contend with. When the kids were younger, this contributed to my dislike of cooking. I already hated it, but it became amplified as a parent. -
A Civilized Family Meal
My husband was a great cook. OK, I know I’ve said this multiple times. I bring this up because I don’t remember a bad meal that he ever prepared.To identify a favorite family meal, I’ll tell you about a meal that Michael didn’t cook and all three of us enjoyed immensely.
It was a warm, comfortable evening in Louisville, Colorado. Michael, our son Matt and I came together after we were done with work. We had been given a gift for dinner at the Melting Pot Restaurant. Matt had never been to a Melting Pot and didn’t know what to expect.
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Expensive Taste
Reflecting on what my favorite family meal Is actually makes my mouth water. Well, since I don’t love or even like the preparation of any kind of meal I like to go out to eat. And when I go out to eat I love to consume lobster. Because of the cost, it certainly cannot be considered a family meal. Call me selfish, but even though I love lobster, not everyone in my family feels the same. It’s always better to dine with friends so as not to look to my family like I am overindulging!! -
Baffle Them With Bullshit
I was 25 years old when I started working at ExecuTrain as a computer trainer. I was tasked with teaching adults about how to use Windows, Microsoft products, and other such things. After working there for about 3 months, our network administrator left and my boss said, “Hey Michelle. You said you like technical things, right? Well, here’s our network. Take care of it!” -
Home at Last
My son Matt and I pulled away from the house we had called home for the past fifteen years. It was the only home Matt remembered and a home that I loved. We had come back over spring break to finish emptying out the house and to complete our move to Colorado. -
Growing Pains
The day and year that I really grew up was definitely an important experience. One that I would have forgone forever. This was the day that my dad passed away. He was only sixty-two years old, died of a heart attack, and left his family reeling in shock and dismay. -
Tween Makeover
me, 7th Grade, 1977 I’ve written before about how I had many worries and thoughts about the future when I was young. But I was also a planner. One of the biggest “plans” I had was for my transition from elementary school to Jr. High.
In elementary school, I was a pretty typical kid. Braces, headgear, and rubber bands worked to fix my smile. I took tap dance lessons. In the band, I played the flute.
But I wanted to be different. So I came up with a plan. I was going to have a life makeover! But, of course, “makeover” wasn’t yet a concept.
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What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up?
I’m gonna be an artist when I grow up.
This is the answer I would have given to that age-old question that adults always ask children. I loved to make things out of paper and paint and wood and clay. I didn’t necessarily like coloring books, but I loved art materials. My first memory of Kindergarten is of making a scribble picture on construction paper and then coloring in the created spaces with crayons. -
Indecisive Decisions
The lack of a clear career path kept me from following through and going to college. At first, I wanted to be a clothing designer but I had none of the natural skills to make this work. I thought about being a veterinarian because I loved animals, but I couldn’t get excited about the necessary years of schooling. -
More Than a Secretary
Would you believe that while growing up I wanted to be a housewife and mother? I lived in a wonderful place with a group of stay-at-home moms and housewives. They made this sound like such a fulfilling, relaxing, and happy life. This was in the fifties and women that I knew didn’t work out of the home. We lived in an Ozzie and Harriet atmosphere. -
Computer Geek at Heart
When I was a little kid, I always wanted to be a teacher. I loved the idea of imparting my wisdom to others and knowing more about things than my students did. I always looked up to my teachers and wanted that admiration as well. As I got older, I decided there was no way I was going to be able to teach little kids. I love little kids, but their goofiness can get tiresome. Middle school kids are too hormone riddled to handle and high school kids are too close to adults and many show teachers no respect. So where did that leave me? -
Newspaper to the Rescue
April 7th, 1980. I was 9 years old and was heading to Grandma Is’s house after school. Grandma’s house was only 2 blocks from school and I made the journey without any challenges. It was a beautiful spring day. Not a cloud in the sky. At least not yet. -
The Day That Shook Our World
My husband and I were living in Napa, Ca. Our one-year-old son, Matt was in his eight-sided play area. Our dog, Nikki, was asleep on the bed and Michael had just gotten back from a business meeting in San Francisco.We were all set to watch a world series game between the San Francisco Giants and the Oakland Athletics. It was October 17, 1989. Without warning, the TV screen went black and turned to static. The dog stood up on the bed and looked around with wild eyes. Matt started to cry and Michael, who was concentrating on a business report said “Judy, would you get the dog away from my chair? She keeps bumping it and I can’t type.”
Nikki was nowhere near Michael’s chair. I leaned over to lift Matt out of the play area and got so dizzy, I thought I was going to fall over. Simultaneously Michael and I looked at each other and said “earthquake”.
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Sunny Skies and Tornados
The only real natural event that I have ever been in was the tornado that touched down in Beaver Dam in the year 1980. It was always felt that we would never be subject to a tornado because of the lake effect. In searching for the data on this tornado I note that this evidently is misinformation as there were others mentioned, just not memorable to me. The tornado that I witnessed firsthand happened on April 7th, 1980. -
Rusty But Wonderful
I don’t remember that my first bike was an important item to the rest of the family as it was to me. You see, my older sister was a bookworm, not into physical activities such as bike riding. I, on the other hand, loved to be outside and really loved to ride bikes, scooters, and roller skates. In order for me to accomplish bike riding I actually had to go to a neighbor’s house who had adult children who left an old rusty bike in her garage. She graciously let me ride this bike almost on a daily basis. -
Make Way For A Landing
It was the end of the summer before the second grade and Lisa and I were on our way home from Grandma Is’s house where we spent our summer days while mom was at work. We were riding our bikes and because I was only 7, I usually rode on the sidewalk. -
Broken Vajayjay
When I was growing up, I loved having a bicycle. It offered freedom and adventure. I would ride my bike to friends’ houses and as necessary transportation. Back in the day, we didn’t wear helmets. I was responsible in that my bike was registered with the city and it had a license sticker on the frame.
Generally speaking, I was a careful driver. I rode on the right-hand side of the road (not on the sidewalk) and used hand signals when I was turning.
But there was this one time when I wasn’t as careful as I should have been…and I suffered the consequences.
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Bicycle Built for Two
I think I had three two-wheeled bikes over my childhood. The first one was my least memorable. It was painted a rusty color and had a triangle-shaped kickstand on the back wheel. I disliked this bike from the day it arrived and I begged mom and dad for a new bike. The tires kept going flat and it was very hard to steer. -
Flirting with Rotten Eggs
I was never much of a flirt in grade school. I was the youngest of three girls and I had no experience talking with my male classmates. They made me nervous and scared me to death. -
The Stress of Kindergarten
I remember several childhood grade school memories, so, where to start?The first one I recall was I was in kindergarten, it was Armistice Day, and of course, I had no idea what that meant. I went to Wilson School and had just recently moved to the north end of town. This meant I had to take a bus from school to home.
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Traumatic Events
I had a few traumatic events happen to me during my grade school years. Both events were a result of my teachers and had a significant impact on my feelings about those years. -
She’s In Trouble Now
Thank God I’m a grown-ass woman AND no longer a teacher. Do you know what that means? No. more. recess! I don’t get in trouble (or get others in trouble) anymore.
I’ve always hated recess. I’ve written before about spending a snowy recess with Mary and Mr. Fry in the boiler room here. But that isn’t the only time I purposely skipped out on recess…
I was in First Grade. My First-grade classroom was on the lower level of the building, closest to the boiler room, Mrs. Goetz was my teacher. We had been working on something when the announcement was made that it was almost recess time. But only students that were done with their work would be allowed to go out. I was done with my work, but Sean and Rochelle would need to stay in.
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Worrying About the What-Ifs
You know the quote… “A mother’s work is never done”? Well – I think it’s more accurate to say “A mother’s worry is never done”. When thinking about what I worry about, I start to think that it’s easier to ask what I don’t worry about. -
Worry – A Wasted Emotion
One of the first self-help books I read in my twenties was written by Dr. Wayne Dyer. He discussed guilt and worry as being the two most wasted emotions. He explained that guilt was about the past and worry was about things to happen in the future. Both of these emotions are out of our control unless we learn from past mistakes, rid ourselves of guilt, and take appropriate action to eliminate worry in the future. -
Constant Worrier
Everyone says that I am a constant worrier. To be honest I think I worry so much that I don’t even realize that I am worrying. It is my way of life. I do have a lot of people that seem to need me to take care of them. (I’m just kidding actually.) I read somewhere that worrying is a total waste of time and energy. I do realize this but just can’t seem to let my worrying go. -
Rambunctious Boys and a Mini Me
Is there a difference between raising girls vs boys? I definitely experienced a significant difference between the two sexes. I wasn’t prepared for the discrepancy I experienced as I only grew up with my older sister and never had to deal with boys in the household. -
A Permanently Exhausted Pigeon
At this point of my life, I don’t think I’m a night owl OR an early bird. I know for sure that I’ve never been an early bird. The idea of waking up early in the morning puts absolute dread in my heart. -
Early Bird Wannabe
Here are the grandmas on a “work weekend”. It’s probably around midnight. See one grandma is snoozing and the other is waiting for the party to begin! In college, my mom and two grandmas would come up to Eau Claire and help decorate my dorm room or apartment. Inevitably, we would chat for a while, go out to eat, and begin working on our 10 pm. I would begin to fade at about 1:00 am, and mom was just hitting her stride.
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White Christmas
My all-time favorite Christmas movie would have to be White Christmas. By the time the season is done, I will have watched it at least a dozen times. The music and dancing make me smile every time. -
Show Me the Money
Chore list from age 5 – Notice no allowance listed! As a child, I remember having some chores, but because I didn’t have to do my work alone, it never seemed to be a big ordeal. Mom had taken the time to type a list for Lisa and me that we were expected to do in order to get a weekly allowance. I don’t actually remember ever getting the allowance, even though there was a spot on the chore list to write down the amount owed.
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The Go-To Kid
When I was young and living at home I was required to do a great number of chores around the house.I have two siblings, one four years older than me and one five years younger than me. It seemed that I was always the right candidate to impose most jobs onto.
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She Can Do It all
This job list is from when I was about 11 years old. Saturday mornings were for cleaning when I was a child. Mom worked in the morning and then went grocery shopping. Michelle and I were left at home to get our chores done.
I remember that my responsibilities not only included making my bed and cleaning my room, scrubbing sinks, and toilets, and vacuuming the house but also motivating my sister to get her jobs done as well.
THAT was the challenge!
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The Guilty One
Being the youngest of three girls had benefits when it came to chores except for the guilt. I often felt guilty because Sandy seemed to be responsible for all the chores. If I wanted to help, I was either too little, too slow or I didn’t know how. My ability to feel guilt got overdeveloped. It never occurred to me that being five years younger than my sister did present challenges. -
Weird Habits
When thinking of habits, I know I have more, but these are the 3 that came to mind…Procrastinating, Creasing and Chickees!
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My Wandering Mind
I have this habit of not focusing. This results in not listening or reading instructions and I would like to correct this habit. Have you ever tried to sew an evening dress or skirt without reading the directions? Well, I have done this and I must say it does work out, but not without a few problems that could have been eliminated had I read the instructions.
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Creating a Sense of Urgency
From the time I was very young, I’ve lacked a sense of urgency. I was often late for school, missed my ride to school, and had to walk home because I would put too many tasks into too short a period of time and I would run out of time before I ran out of tasks. -
A Toddler With a Knife
It doesn’t matter if I want to do the thing or not…I still procrastinate. Procrastination often occurs when I’m tired and the activity takes some mental energy.For example, I’m supposed to edit a post about..procrastination…for our Sidetracked Sisters blog…
I love taking pictures, looking at old photos, creating images using software, and posting on social media. But I still procrastinate!
AND my procrastination strategies are SOOOOO sneaky!
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Just One More Chapter
I am an expert at procrastination. I always have good intentions and look forward to accomplishing great things such as getting ready for holidays, special occasions, and just regular household activities. But, I tend to find just about anything else to do instead of what I am supposed to do. Yup, this is called procrastination. -
Laminated To-Do Lists
I am the queen of procrastination. No matter how hard I try or plan to be efficient and punctual, I always seem to fall short. Whether it’s cleaning my house, working in the yard, or some other task I’m not fond of doing, I always seem to find better things to do with my time. -
Wants Before Needs
Procrastination could or should be my middle name. When I was young and my mom was at work, there were certain things that had to be done before she came home. I was home alone and my pastime of choice was watching old movies. The duties I had could wait, especially if there was a Cary Grant or Clark Gable or Robert Mitcham movie on TV. I loved sitting with my back against the ottoman watching old classic movies. I would watch the clock and time it out so I could run around like a crazy person and get my tasks done before mom came home. -
Don’t Mess With the Original
I know that back in the day, kids would go from house to house Trick-or-Treating with a pillowcase to collect candy–not even necessarily wearing costumes. Halloween, as we know it today, began in the 1930s with children receiving homemade cookies and pieces of cake, fruit, nuts, coins, and small toys.
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Sports, An Acquired Taste
I grew up in the day when sports were not a big part of a girl’s interest package. I was rather ambivalent about sports on TV like football and basketball. My dad enjoyed watching and I enjoyed spending time with him, so I watched some too. -
I Just Don’t Get It!
Get your own “Just Say No” items by Steven Rhodes at https://www.redbubble.com Anyone who knows me, knows that I’m not a fan of sports. I grew up in a household of 3 girls and dad was not a big sports fan either. I actually try to avoid sports if I can. I know that’s not a popular opinion in today’s society, but that’s just who I am.
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Thank You Title IX
Today girls can be both a girly girl and a chef, a ballerina and an artist, a princess, and an athlete. Life was a bit more lopsided when I was a child, although I didn’t realize at the time how much things WERE changing. I have always been open to liking and participating in sports. It’s just that I’m not that good.
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Sports on a Limited Basis
To say I am not actually a sports fan is an understatement. I think this happened when I was very young. My Dad was an avid sports fan and on his off time from working, he enjoyed watching them on tv or listening to them on the radio. He was not a physical participant, but a chair-side enthusiast. He would actually sit in his recliner watching some type of sport on tv and have another sport plugged into his ear from the radio. I hated Sundays because that was when sports were constantly on our tv. My friends would be going to picnics, to their family cabins, visiting friends and relatives, and just enjoying life. We, on the other hand, were sitting at home because dad had to watch his sporting event. He even had to watch sports when we would visit relatives. I suppose visiting friends was limited to when there were no sports on tv. Like that ever happened! As an adult when I hear the usual sounds of sports on tv I just cringe. I try to share what event is on, but if the sun is shining I am out of there. -
Dates to Remember
We all have dates we’ll always rememberOne of mine comes up in September
September 22 was the date that mom passed
The memory of her forever will last
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Work to be Free
Sitting in front of my computer screenTrees outside changing hue
Mindlessly working along
Wishing I were doing something new
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Fun Dad
“I want to be a fun dad,” my husband said.
His eyes sparkled
with tearful anticipation
as we worked to adopt our sons from Russia.
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Love of Springers
The love of a dog is a beautiful thingI’ve had many and they are so special in their own way.
One never replaces the other,
But fills the days with love and endless days of play
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Not Hard To Find
Home on MacArthur Drive The first time I left home was the first and the last. I graduated from high school in 1962, worked as a secretary for the Superintendent of Schools prior to graduation, and upon graduation, then in August of that year, I went to work for the next fifty-six years at the law office. I got engaged while a senior in high school and waited one year to regroup and got married in the summer of 1963.
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Freedom and Jesus
I always knew I would go to college. It was more than growing up, more than the next step…it was freedom!
Actually, I didn’t even know there was an option. It wasn’t until years later that I discovered that my dad didn’t really believe that I would go…and graduate. (I’m kinda glad that no one ever shared that little detail with me.)
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Naïve Decisions
Lake Monona When I turned seventeen, I was reeling from life in general. On Mother’s Day of 1966, my oldest sister passed away. Up until then, my life revolved around her care and helping my mom with her workload.
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Longing for College Life
The first time I moved away from home would be moving to college. I was so excited to make the move, I had planned out my entire dorm room before even getting home from my college tour. -
Wisdom from Mom
Life in my thirties presented a huge contrast to life in my twenties. I had married very young, divorced, rebounded into a second marriage, and divorced a second time all before I turned thirty. -
Cadaver Grafts and Karate Class
Bradley (age 10), Nathan (age 7) and I were all taking a karate class. I thought it would be a great way for the boys to learn some discipline and also burn off some extra energy. (which they had a lot of) Many days, it was a struggle to get them to class, but every once in a while, they enjoyed going. -
Strolling Thru My 30s
Reflecting back, my thirties were very busy and challenging, but all in all, good years. There were a few bumps in the road, such as job changes, purchasing a different home, and a miscarriage. My husband and I each had good jobs, we were both happy and healthy. We were parents of two girls ages five and 10 who were also happy and healthy. -
The Infertility Mountain
I turned 30 in 1994. Tom and I had moved to Sun Prairie to be closer to my family when we began having children of our own. Unfortunately, starting a family turned out to NOT be so straightforward. And that is the theme of my 30s…infertility.
“You have been assigned this mountain to show others it can be moved.” -Anonymous
Here is my “baby” Eli. Before Tom and I divorced, we separated for a while. Within days of him moving out, I bought a dog. We began trying to start our family when I was 27. We got divorced, childless, when I was 33. Then I married Craig when I was 35. More infertility work followed. We got Luka and Kadon from Russia in 2006, when I was 41.
It seemed like the goal to start/have a family colored every event of that decade. To say that my clock was ticking VERY LOUDLY is not overstating the facts. -
Cajun Cheese Soup
I’m not a big fan of spicy things, so I was hesitant to try this Cajun Cheese soup when I first encountered it, but it quickly became a favorite of mine and now of the entire family! -
Creamed Chicken
My mom made the most fabulous chicken recipe. Unfortunately, after she passed it seems to have gone with her. I would ask for this delicacy often and found it to be absolutely delicious. It was what she called creamy chicken. Not such an original name, but it was incredible tasting. It was, of course, with chicken cut up not in small pieces, she used condensed milk and the drippings from the chicken. This is what Legacy writing is all about. See I might have had this recipe had I had the opportunity to ask her about this and have it in writing. This is all I really can tell of this recipe. I have searched in her recipe box and it just has not shown up. Once when I was pregnant with my first child I actually had three helpings of this delicacy. That was the last time I had the luxury of this dish. After that, she tried to use substitutes like chicken soup or whatever, but it just wasn’t the same. I am still searching. -
Chile Relleno Casserole
Mexican Food is one of my favorites. I’m not sure if this recipe qualifies as traditional Mexican Cuisine but in my opinion, it’s a delicious side dish with any meal. The hardest part for me is finding the whole poblano peppers to use as the basis of the casserole. I have substituted diced chiles however my favorite is still the whole poblano peppers. -
Rhubarb Custard Pie
When It was summer, I was the one responsible for mowing grandma Is’ lawn. In the backyard, I would make slow careful circles around her peonies and rhubarb patch.
The peonies would bloom and later be held up with a circular piece of chicken wire through the summer. The rhubarb grew unrestricted. Leaves were generously pulled–never cut–from the plant. I would pull and single stalk and suck on the puckeringly tart end as I sat on the hard dry ground under the weeping willow. The cicadas song sounded like the power lines vibrating. I loved the late afternoon when the cooing of morning doves was accompanied by other lawn mowers humming from distant yards.Grandma would bring in an armload of the big-leafed stalks to make her rhubarb custard pie.
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Give Me Aladdin’s Lamp
One of my favorite Disney movies is Aladdin. I love Robin Williams’s portrayal of the genie. He has so many great lines and it makes me laugh every time I watch that movie. While watching that movie, I’ve often thought, “What would I wish for if I had 3 wishes?” -
Winning the Lottery
I know, “Winning the Lottery” was not supposed to be the theme for this week’s sidetracked post. I guess it was my turn to break the rules or in further transparency, it looks like I wasn’t listening when the topic was discussed. In my defense, I’ve never been much of a believer in Genies in or out of a bottle or in the Pot of Gold at the end of the Leprechauns’ rainbow. But I have known people who won the lottery. -
Three Wishes … No Thank You
Okay, for some crazy reason, maybe a genie, a shooting star, maybe a fairy, birthday candles, or perhaps a leprechaun unbelievably grants me three wishes.What would I wish?
Now, I have never bought a lottery ticket.
I was once given tokens to spend as part of a weekend package that included a visit to a casino. I gave the tokens away.
So this opportunity will be a real challenge for me. How big or small should I wish? Well…
Health, wealth, and happiness are the first things that come to mind.
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Happy, Healthy and Successful
If I had three wishes:
My first wish would be that as I always say when I wish on a star, birthday cake candle, or whatever it is that needs a wish is that my family and friends would all be happy, healthy, and successful.
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The Creepy Black Moon
I lay in my bed mid-afternoon. The orange curtains made the softened sunlight somehow warmer. Bored, my eyelids would slowly close—a childhood naptime–the sweet stuff of adult memories.
But in the evening, the same room seemed sinister. The closet door hid unknown horrors. Under my bed lurked creatures just waiting for me to close my eyes so that they could come out and “get me”.
Even today, I remember the window, through which I could view the full moon.
I woke up one night and lay in the bed, dreading the idea of getting out and having my feet touch the floor. So I lay there. The only thing that protected me was the sheets and blankets that were pulled up tight under my chin. I felt safe, safer with the protection of the layers of cloth.
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Circus Trauma
Circus Nursery
I was 4 years old and had a beautiful circus-themed nursery. There was a handmade circus wagon on one side that my dad made special for me, complete with a canopy overhead. The circus wagon had cute stuffed animals on it of a lion, a tiger, and a bear, among others. On the opposite wall were pictures of those same sweet circus animals. Mom thought she had done such a great job making this cute, sweet nursery, but little did she know… -
Never Quite Enough
I have always wanted to be good, not necessarily the best, but just good at whatever I did. This especially was the case when I would participate in team sports. One of my fears as a child was when being chosen to play games and teams were needed I would never be chosen as one of the first few. This left me feeling bad that I didn’t have the ability or the reputation to be either the most popular or the best at a sport. Consequently, I always shied away from playing team sports. -
Missing Mom
It was chilly in my room. The snow was wisping in through three holes in the storm window and landing on the foot of my bed. I lay in bed and listened for the sounds of the radio or the sounds that mom normally was making in the kitchen. All I could hear was silence. -
Scared Shitless
I have done a lot of babysitting in my life. I was never scared or terrified while babysitting or of the dark, until I saw the movie “The Babysitter”. -
Erogenous Zones?
When I was in my late twenties, I discovered self-help books. The first book of this type that I read was called “Your Erroneous Zones” and was written by Dr. Wayne Dyer. To be honest, my friends had told me the title was “Your Erogenous Zones” and the title piqued my interest. -
Color Me Beautiful
Back in the early 1980s, a book was published called “Color Me Beautiful”. The inside flap of the book states “Using simple guidelines, professional color consultant Carole Jackson helps you choose the thirty shades that make you look smashing. COLOR ME BEAUTIFUL will also help you: develop your color personality; learn to perfect your make-up color; discover your clothing personality; use color to solve specific figure problems, and more, including full-color palettes containing the thirty shades for each season–pages you can cut out to carry when you shop!” -
So Much More Than the Story
What makes someone a reader?
Doesn’t everyone love stories?
I think I was born loving books. In Beaver Dam, I loved the old stuffy, overheated public library when I was a child. The wide entrance stairway led to a foyer where you could go left to the adult area. Or, you could turn right and go up a creaky flight of stairs to the children’s room. It held a vague feeling of…expectation. -
The Easy Way Out
College Bound When I was seventeen, my oldest sister passed away. Life as I had always known it was gone forever. She had been the focus in my life for the past nine years.
Suddenly my family went back to life as normal. I didn’t really have a “normal”. My sister and her husband had bought a home and were raising their family. My Mom and Dad began to travel and enjoy each other’s company. I wasn’t sure where I fit in.
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Meant to Be?
Looking back at my life, what is the one decision that I would change if I could?Well, there is one thing that I wish I could do-over. By changing this one thing, my life would’ve taken an entirely different turn. Keep in mind, that I’m very happy with how things have turned out, but I do wonder how things would be different. -
For All the Right Reasons
I am supposed to write about decisions in my past that I would change. To be honest I feel that I have in reality made mostly the right decisions for myself.
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Making the Wrong Decision
There is a 1980 song called “Freewill” by Rush that spoke to my adolescent metaphysical angst about the meaning of life. The repeating snippet that has stuck in my soul since I was a High School sophomore is…
“You can choose a ready guide in some celestial voice.
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.”
I met my first husband, Tom, during the first week of my freshman year at college. He was tall and charismatic. The leader of his church student group, he seemed so sure of himself. Church leaders trusted him and were molding him to take a leadership role in the group. A confident musician, he sang and played guitar in the worship group during Sunday service. I saw him as talented, smart, and goal-driven.