Everyone says that I am a constant worrier. To be honest I think I worry so much that I don’t even realize that I am worrying. It is my way of life. I do have a lot of people that seem to need me to take care of them. (I’m just kidding actually.) I read somewhere that worrying is a total waste of time and energy. I do realize this but just can’t seem to let my worrying go.
Worrying about something that you can’t do anything about is fruitless, but how do you stop this awful habit? It seems if I don’t have something to worry about, I will certainly find something. For example, I worry that I won’t be around to see how everything in my family turns out. Well, we all know that I am not going to be around forever (another reason to worry) and I don’t want to leave the party early. So, see I worry about things that are impossible to even happen without worrying about if they will. My doctor told me that at some point we all have to leave the party early. Well, the reason for another worry is I don’t like to leave a party early.
Truthfully, I feel I sort of have my worries under control. (This is not agreed by those that know me). So as not to make myself crazy, I can actually make my mind tune out a certain subject, saying to myself I will ponder this at some other time. I also find that reading helps me to stop worrying. But, I do find that if it is something really, really troublesome, I find my mind constantly goes back to the problem at hand. I am also an immediate gratification person. This means if there is a problem, I want it fixed immediately. This causes considerable worry especially if not everyone involved is on the same page. If there is a problem I want to fix it right away.
When I start to worry about things that I have no control of, say my health, I just have to let it go. No, I am not always successful, but what is the alternative? When I worry I also tend to talk it to death. I find that talking about a problem makes me feel better. The people that hear about this problem over and over by me tend to get really tired of hearing me reflect and talk about this situation to death. But, for me this is my therapy. It just creates the need for therapy for those unfortunate people that have to endure hearing about my dilemma.
But, I guess, I will go on worrying and making everyone around me crazy. Let’s face it, what else can they do?
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