Birthdays Come and Go

Our birthdays come and go and have some strange properties depending on where you are in this game of life. When we are young it seems like our birthdays take forever to come. Second only to the wait for Christmas is the wait for our next birthday. I would ask for something I wanted and mom would tell me to put it on my birthday list. It seemed that was the death of the want because it seemed like my next birthday was eons away. 

I actually don’t remember much about my early birthday celebrations. I remember that the family had a nice meal together and mom always made sure to have our special birthday cake. There would also be a gift or two that I’d been wanting forever. We didn’t have huge celebrations or special outings. Still, our birthdays always seemed very special.  

In 1953, we celebrated my golden birthday the day before Easter. On April 4, I turned 4 years old. Easter was on April 5th that year. Mom took my favorite angel food cake and decorated it with a ring of Easter bunnies made of marshmallows. I treasured that cake and kept one of the bunnies until the marshmallows were as hard as rocks. I couldn’t stand the thought of throwing it away. 

The years to follow are all kind of a blur. I do remember that they seemed to be a long time in coming. The family celebrations were all pretty similar to the birthdays of the past. A special dinner in the dining room, a favorite meal, and my angel food cake. Of course, each cake had more candles. 

The next birthday I remember was my 21st birthday. The only change that year was that Dad mixed me a “highball” to celebrate my coming of age. I’m not sure if he knew that this was not my first alcoholic beverage. It was my first legal taste of alcohol.

I remember my 50th birthday because I stayed in bed most of the day with a nasty hangover. Lisa had hosted a party at her home in Sun Prairie. I had made the mistake of sharing that I loved tequila shots with Margarita chasers. Lisa’s former husband, Tom, and his friends made sure that there was no shortage of these drinks given to me over the night. The next day, I might have turned 50 but I felt many years older.

It seems to me that birthday celebrations have taken on a whole new meaning for the children today. When I lived in Colorado, parents were taking their children on fancy outings including Mani/pedis for several of the birthday girl’s friends and a trip to Major League ball games for the birthday boys. It seemed to me that there was a competition to see who could plan the biggest celebration. Quite a contrast to the celebrations when we were young. 

As an adult, at work, the birthday person would bring doughnuts for the staff and often they would decorate our desks with streamers and banners. My favorite birthday cake changed from angel food to chocolate sheet cake with chocolate frosting. It has to be served with vanilla ice cream.

As I have gotten older, it feels like my birthdays come one on top of the other. They feel so different from the long waits I experienced as a kid.  Sometimes, I have to do the subtraction to figure out exactly how old I am. It just doesn’t seem to matter as much as it did when there were goals like becoming a teenager, being able to drive a car, voting, and drinking alcohol legally.

My birthday in 2023 was one that I will always hold dear in my heart. As a sad coincidence, My husband, Michael passed away on the afternoon of my birthday. At first, it made me feel incredibly sad to share this day in such a dramatic fashion. As I reflect on it now, it feels comforting to remember his final day in conjunction with my birthday. The roses he arranged for the hospice nurse to bring me on April 4, 2023, were a special, unexpected surprise. 

Happy Birthday to all of you out there. Best Wishes for all of your birthday dreams to come true.

Click here to check out other Sidetracked opinions

Click here to listen to the Overcoming Writer’s Block podcast

Want to create your own legacy? Join the Sidetracked Sisters and start now!

Ever thought about working with a Life Coach? Are you creative or a writer who is frustrated with your inability to do the work you so desperately feel called to do? Check out Lisa Hoffman Coaching.

#sidetrackedsisters #sidetrackedjudy #sidetrackedlegacies #legacywriting #legacystories #writeyourownlegacy #LisaHoffmanCoaching #specialcakes #birthdays #birthdaycake #familyparties #celebrations #memories