My parents shared many of their characteristics with me. Some were learned and some were in my genes.
Dad was a procrastinator. He would finish dinner, sit down to watch something on TV, and often would fall asleep. He’d wake up when it was time to go to bed and then he’d start working.
I regularly procrastinate on things I must do until after everyone is in bed. Then when the house is quiet, I can get my work done.
My dad was a worrier. He worried about his three girls constantly. I could hear him and Mom talking about the happening of the day and Dad would express his concerns and how worried he was. This went along with his being overly protective. He told me not to try out for school plays or for cheerleading because I’d just be disappointed when I didn’t make it.
I understand how he felt and have worked hard to hold back the flapping tongue of discouragement to keep Matt from trying out for sports teams or for things like the National Honor Society. It’s very hard for me not to tell him not to do these things because I don’t want to see him disappointed.
Dad discouraged us from going horseback riding, ice skating, skiing, and sailing because he was terrified that we would be hurt. (We didn’t always listen)
I could identify with this feeling. Michael often sat me down and coached me to be more supportive to help Matt have a happy childhood. If it had been up to me, Matt would have missed the time he spent playing hockey because I was so sure he was going to get hurt.
People often stated that I reminded them of my dad. This was true especially when I would worry and fret about things that usually never happened like bad weather, someone getting hurt, or someone failing to succeed at something they wanted to do.
Mom loved to travel, hated to clean, and would rather read a book than do yard work. identified with how she felt. We both could kick into gear and get things done when we had to but in truth, we’d rather not. She needed quantities of downtime and so do I.
He and Mom had a very close relationship. I always knew I wanted that too. In that way, I was like both mom and dad.