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Growing Older With Frustration
When I put on an angry face, it’s not because I’m angry. When I put on this face, I am usually frustrated. My greatest frustrations are with myself. I ask myself deprecating questions like: Why am I so clumsy? Why can’t I remember to do this process correctly? How many times do I have to do a thing before I finally do it the right way? More often than not, the person I’m most frustrated with… is me.As I grow older, I find myself bumping into frustration more often than I ever expected. I recently returned to work in the banking profession, a field I’ve known for most of my life. Yet the tasks that once felt instinctive now leave me wondering what on earth has happened to the muscle memory I used to rely on. It’s as if my brain occasionally misplaces its reading glasses and then pretends it never owned a pair.
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Tangled Roots
I moved back to Wisconsin in 2014. My front yard garden was planted with several things I didn’t care for, random choices that felt more like leftovers than a plan. A tall cactus stood awkwardly like an uninvited guest. Nearby, a bush resembled Pampas grass, except it wasn’t. Nothing flowed. Nothing belonged. The whole yard looked as though the plants had been tossed there in a hurry, each one competing for attention without harmony.One day, while wandering the garden center at Fleet Farm, I found a spirea bush I loved. Its name hinted at the warm autumn colors it would show in fall. I brought one home and planted it proudly. My husband adored it instantly and guarded it as if it were a rare treasure. When my sister asked for a cutting, he actually stood on the front porch to ensure she didn’t take more than a polite snippet.
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Disaster Houston Style
In the mid-1970s, I relocated to Houston, Texas. I had never set foot in Texas before. This was my first experience living in a big city, and I found it both intimidating and exciting. I interviewed with several banks and was offered a position with Houston Citizens Bank and Trust, located right in downtown Houston. I was thrilled with myself for landing a job so quickly.After adjusting to the roaches that emerged from the faucets and scurried back into the walls the moment I turned on the kitchen light, I slowly settled into my new surroundings. My biggest challenge, however, was the ever-changing weather.
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The Quiet Side of Wealth
I’ve been a banker most of my adult life. I’ve seen people flaunt their money, living well on the surface. They always seemed to have the means to buy the great house, the fancy car, and all the luxuries that spoke to the world that they were rich.But I’ve also known many wealthy people. They lived comfortably, yes, with lovely homes and nice cars, but more importantly, they woke each morning without the dread that comes from living beyond their means. They had peace. To me, that’s what true wealth looks like.
Wealth is more than money; it’s the ability to live life on your own terms. It’s having enough resources, financial, emotional, spiritual, and relational, to feel secure, generous, and free.
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Was It Fate, or Just a Yes?
When it comes to the idea of our lives being controlled by Fate, I have very mixed emotions. Some of my friends shrug and say, “Stuff happens,” as if life is completely out of their hands. Another one of those phrases is “It is what it is,” again implying that we’re ruled by fate. I’ve always had a hard time with that idea.I believe our consequences come at the end of a process that begins with our thoughts. What we think about shapes how we feel. Those feelings lead to actions, and our actions create results. In Catechism class and Sunday School, I was taught that we’ve been given the gift of free will, the ability to choose our own path. It’s those choices that determine how our lives unfold.
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Kool-Aid on The Rocks
When I was a kid, my mom wasn’t a fan of Kool-Aid. She thought it was nothing but sugar and dye, a shortcut to bad teeth and hyper kids. If we asked for something sweet, she’d say, “There’s always water,” like it was the treat of the century. Every once in a while, though, a few packets of Kool-Aid would sneak into the cupboard, and that felt like rebellion in powder form.I didn’t really fall for Kool-Aid until my mid-teens. Spencer, my boyfriend back then, and I would whip up a pitcher of cherry Kool-Aid and make grilled cheese sandwiches. We’d pour our bright red drinks into glasses, carry everything out to the picnic table in the backyard, and giggle like we were getting away with something.
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Fireplaces, Firepits, and Fond Memories
I love fireplaces in their many shapes and forms. Whether they’re made of stone, brick, or surrounded by polished wood, they seem to say, “Come, sit for a while.” A fireplace is a natural focal point in any home, a gathering place for warmth, reflection, and connection. There’s a special kind of beauty that comes from gazing into the flickering flames and glowing embers. My mind often drifts and dreams as I watch them dance. Faces appear, stories unfold, and before I know it, I’m miles away in thought. It’s a meditation of sorts, quiet, grounding, and endlessly soothing. -
Sunday, Time to Reflect and Reconnect
Sundays have a rhythm all their own. They mark both an ending and a beginning, a soft pause before the rush of another week. Depending on the season, they can be a doorway to something new or a gentle reminder to wrap up what’s unfinished.
When I was working full-time, I’ll admit, Sunday nights were my least favorite. No matter how productive I tried to be, the day always slipped away too quickly. By bedtime, I’d feel that familiar twinge of dread. Monday was waiting, and I wasn’t ready to meet it.
As a kid, Sundays had a very different flavor. The day began with church. I loved getting dressed up and sitting with my mom and sisters, listening to the sermon and wondering how it applied to me. Afterward, we’d change into comfy clothes, and Dad would settle into his red recliner for the “game of the day.” Football, baseball, golf, he loved them all. Before long, his interest would give way to a nap, and we’d hear the familiar sound of soft snores coming from his chair.
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History: From Then to Now
I remember when I was little, I used to hide under my grandmother’s quilting frame and listen to her and the women in our family complain about how expensive everything was. I asked Mom why Grandma liked to make quilts. She said it was too expensive to buy them already made.
I loved our handmade quilts and thought Grandma was wise to know how to do things like make jam and jelly, can fruit, bake bread, and make pies. She learned practical things, and she knew how to save money.
Growing up in the 1950s, my world was filled with hopscotch, saddle shoes, and black-and-white TV. Elvis was everyone’s heartthrob. We were practicing “bomb drills” in our school basement. The fear of “the bomb” was real, even if we didn’t understand it. Moving forward to my grade school years, we used to buy movie tickets at school. They came on a card with perforations. Each ticket cost $.25. The whole card cost three dollars and would allow us to go to the movies every Saturday afternoon for 12 weeks.
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Polish, Parenthood, and Puppies
Fingernails were not an item I paid much attention to as a kid. Many of the other little girls would come to school with their nails painted. I was much more interested in being a tomboy and playing cowboys and indians. In about the fourth grade, we had a teacher who kept a chart on each of us and checked different areas every day. One of the areas she emphasized was hygiene, which included checking our fingernails to ensure they were clean and well-shaped. I always received a negative mark in this category. I also chewed my cuticles until they bled. This didn’t add to a nice-looking nail experience.
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Cat Scratch Fever
Back in the early 1980s, I was invited to participate in a fashion show. The show was being held at a Champagne Winery in the Napa Valley. I lived in the valley and worked for the local bank. The owner of the shop supplying the clothes asked people in different occupations to be guest models. I was excited and pleased to be asked.We met with the store owner and selected several fashionable looks to showcase for the show. I remember I was to wear a cream-colored knit jumpsuit belted with a wide belt featuring a stone buckle. With it, I wore a necklace with a stone matching the buckle. Another item chosen for me was a mohair coat in shades of gold and cream. I would wear it over the jumpsuit.
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Forget the Books, Listen to the Flowers
The flowers I grew up with filled my summers with beauty. My mom made it a point to plant them in different spots around our yard. I loved the moss roses and the geraniums, and the borders lined with white and purple alyssum. Tulips appeared in early spring, but where they came from, how they grew, and where they should be planted was a complete mystery to me.I was the youngest of three girls and considered too little to handle something as important as planting the flowers that made our home beautiful. My sister Sandy always seemed to know what she was doing. I’ll admit it, I was jealous.
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The New Face of Truthfulness
The practice of being truthful has changed. Years ago, being truthful was more about personal character and reputation. Handshakes often sealed a deal. Neighbors, coworkers, and family knew if your words matched your actions. Truth was simple, face-to-face, and rooted in trust.Today, truthfulness feels more complicated. With social media, we are tempted to share a version of ourselves. Information overload makes it harder to separate fact from opinion, and sometimes even the most well-meaning people struggle to know what’s really true. The face-to-face element of being truthful no longer exists.
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Adding Kayaks to the List
When I was a teenager, I loved to go canoeing. We would head out on Beaver Dam Lake as soon as the spring sun warmed the air and work on our tans. It became a ritual for the eight of us each year.At Girl Scout Camp Blackhawk, canoeing was a major activity, and I loved every moment. We spent hours learning how to paddle correctly and steer accurately. Time passed, and after I moved away from home, I never had the chance to continue canoeing or to try kayaking.
When I returned to Wisconsin in 2014, kayaking had become a popular sport in town. There was a rental spot at Waterworks Park and a launching area that made getting in and out of a kayak simple. My sister and I would pass it often on our daily walks and always said, “One day we’ll try it.” But we never did.
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Enthusiasm Makes the Sale
Yesterday, my orthopedic surgeon sold me on something I swore I’d never buy: two new shoulders. And he did it with nothing more than pure, unfiltered enthusiasm.Years ago, when I was trained as a sales trainer, I learned that 85% of any sale comes down to enthusiasm. The same words spoken in a monotone simply won’t get the same results. Yesterday, in that exam room, I got a masterclass in just how true that is.
Several years ago, I began having severe pain in both shoulders. An MRI revealed that my rotator cuffs were irreparably torn. My doctor suggested injections to help manage the pain. The first two rounds, spaced 90 days apart, worked well. But when I went for the third injection, nothing. No relief at all.
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Fighting Exhaustion
Exhaustion has been a constant in my life. Some people know stress. Others know heartbreak. I know exhaustion. For as long as I can remember, I have needed 8–10 hours of sleep to feel refreshed. When I was a toddler, I would often sleep until noon. Mom would wake me up so I could have lunch with my two sisters when they came home from school each day.Going to grade school required a battle to get me out of bed in the morning. I remember my Dad shouting, “I want to hear two feet on the floor,” multiple times before I complied. I recall falling asleep at my desk during my first hour class in both junior and senior high school. I could fall asleep anywhere.
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La Bamba vs. Inhibitions
As a child, I was socially shy, especially around boys and men. I was the youngest of three girls and had only one male cousin, who made me feel awkward most of the time. In school, I was academically strong but painfully quiet among peers. I thrived on giving book reports and presentations, but often withdrew in everyday social situations.Despite my shyness, I could present myself as confident when a situation called for it. I could mentally disconnect from my discomfort and focus solely on the task at hand. Once the moment passed, I would quietly retreat into myself again.
But there’s a strange contradiction in being shy and still craving connection. I always wanted to connect more, express more, and participate more fully; those internal walls held me back.
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Thoughts of Prosperity
I’ve recently found myself in a very different financial situation. Two and a half years ago, my husband passed away. The first major change was that his income was no longer available. The next came when I left my job at the bank.Since last February, I’ve been living on my retirement income alone. These changes created a new reality: in a very short time, my income was reduced by two-thirds.
What I realized almost immediately was that I needed to examine my mindset around money and prosperity. As I reflected on these areas, I came to see that I had never truly considered myself prosperous.
When I was young, financial stress loomed large due to my sister’s illness and mounting hospital bills. I always believed we lacked the funds to live the life we wanted.
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Unexpected Guidance
An Operations Manual for LifeI was having an unusually crazy day at the furniture store. Nothing was going as planned, and every decision I made proved to be the wrong decision. It was lunchtime, and I told Michael that I was going to the bookstore. I loved browsing the books and thought I might find something to take my mind off my day. I told him that I needed an “Operations Manual for My Life”. We laughed, and I left.
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Love was Served Nightly
For as long as I can remember, our family sat down to a family dinner every night. Even when we worked after school, we still managed to sit down together for our evening meal. Dad was a route salesman back then, and he would still be home every night. He had to make the post office mail deadline for his daily orders, so we ate after this task was completed. -
A Journey from Following to Visioning
I recently had the opportunity to write a vision statement, a personal declaration of what I want from life, built around what I would truly love. I’m exploring my passions, trying to discover what would help me create a life of purpose and joy. -
Seasons of the Soul
Having been raised in Wisconsin, I became attached to the change of the seasons. I enjoyed knowing that the weather in each season brought with it expectations of new and fun activities and adventures. As the bleak and monotonous winter gives way to spring, the new birth is all around us. The trees begin to bud, and the early perennials, such as crocuses and daffodils, show off their welcome blooms. -
Anniversary Lessons
Several years ago, I read a magazine article titled “Why Do I Keep Making the Same Dumb Mistakes?” It hit a nerve. I had two failed marriages and one long-term relationship that didn’t work out. That question, Why do I keep doing this?, felt like it was written just for me.So I sat with it.
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Doctor, I’m Dying
Back in 1987, I was working as a corporate trainer at a bank in Oakland, California. On most days, I would commute from Napa, California, with my husband to Walnut Creek, California. He would drop me off at the BART station, and I would catch the train to Oakland. He worked in Walnut Creek so that he could go on to work. The Train came into Downtown Oakland, about a block away from the bank branch where I was working. The train came into a station that was down in the bowels of the earth. There were three layers of escalators to take to reach the street level. -
Ocean Romance
I’ve always found the ocean completely mesmerizing. There’s something about its vastness that makes you feel small in the best possible way. My first glimpse of the sea was in 1970, shortly after we moved to Napa Valley. San Francisco was just a short drive away, and the moment I saw the Bay, I thought: This might be the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. -
Cowboy Judy
I was not a huge toy person. My sister and I played for hours with paper dolls. I loved it because it meant spending time with my big sister. We also played Ginny Dolls, my bride doll, and baby dolls. We would set up a house in the basement and play with dolls. The best part was that I was included with my sister and sometimes with her friends. -
Tell the Truth or Else
When Matt was young, I gave him one basic rule: Do not lie to me.If you’ve done something wrong, or are about to do something you know I won’t approve of, be honest, and I’ll work with you. If I disagree, I’ll listen to your reasoning, and chances are, I’ll give you the go-ahead.
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Mirror, Mirror, Full of Streaks
When I hear people talk about buying a large, beautiful home, I always think the same things. I wonder how many bathrooms it has? My home has 1 l/2 baths with an unused bath in the basement. That means three toilets. More than three is a figure I don’t even want to think about. I’m guessing that people with five or six bathrooms must have a housekeeper to come and clean for them. I can’t imagine cleaning all of those alone.
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Sadness Without Explanation
I want to speak about a kind of sadness that doesn’t have a clear source. It’s not tied to one event or moment. It’s just there, a low hum beneath everything else. Some days, it feels manageable, and others, it feels like it wraps around me like a heavy coat I never asked to wear. -
Learning with a Screwdriver and a Prayer
Learning is involved in every area of our lives. We may not be involved in formal education, but we are still learning every day. They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. Well, this “old dog” is currently googling how to mow a lawn without losing a toe, so I’d say we’re making progress. -
Banking on Karma
I spent most of my working life in banking, not because it was a deep passion or childhood dream, but because it was what I could do without needing more education. It was practical, stable, and something I could count on. I also loved interacting with people and helping them solve their problems. -
Simplicity Meets Overthinking
I have been told frequently that I overthink everything. Keeping things simple is a real stretch for me. When I see a piece of writing with simple bullet points, I want to write it that way. I often end up with paragraphs instead. I always think I need to say more. I have heard the “less is more” quote, and I understand it. Then I tend to clutter it up. My editing style has trouble leaving anything out. -
Toxic Gossip
Gossip is the silent saboteur of workplace culture. Like a slow-growing cancer, it spreads quietly—creating paranoia, breeding mistrust, and damaging self-esteem in ways that can take years to undo. -
Game Night Gone Wrong
Mom and Dad often left my older sister, Sandy, in charge of me. This happened when they had friends to play cards or just to visit. This was often a recipe for disaster. We would stay upstairs, and we were supposed to keep quiet. Since this was usually on a Saturday night, Mom would do my hair before their company came. In those days, doing hair meant washing and setting it on rollers and drying under a bonnet hair dryer. The idea was that the hair do would last for church the next day. -
Sunrise in my Mind
When I was a young girl, my bike was my passport to freedom. On summer mornings, I’d ride down to the lake, settling onto a cement wall at the end of Burnett Street. I’d sit in the quiet, watching the sunrise over Beaver Dam Lake, or so I thought. Turns out that memory isn’t quite right. My favorite spot faces west. And last I checked, the sun rises in the east. So, what was I really watching? The soft glow of dawn? The lingering twilight? Funny how memories reshape themselves over time.
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Hot Mess Moments
Matlin’s Furniture was a family business, and at one time, all the Sidetracked Sisters played a role in the store’s daily operations. To keep us on the same page, we held weekly sales meetings that started half an hour before our regular workday. -
Lessons in Listening
When we moved back to Wisconsin in 1991, we asked my Mom to move in with us. She was 74 years old at the time and had been widowed since she was 55. We could tell immediately that she liked being back with some of her family. Mom never was one to enjoy living alone. We loved having her, especially because our son Matt was only 2 ½. Having her with us gave my Mom and Matt time to be together and to get to know each other. -
Tell Me Why
I’m often surprised when people get defensive when I ask them questions that begin with “why.” I find that if I am learning to do something new, I learn more quickly and retain more effectively if I know why I am doing it. If I am told to do something just because, I will not remember the steps after the one time is completed. -
Lifelines Bring Laughter
Raising a child without a lifeline is close to impossible or at very best, difficult. I realized this truth when our son Matt was a year old. My husband, Michael had a job that took him to other states from Sunday night to Friday night each week. I had a wonderful woman who would babysit for Matt a few afternoons. This was the time I would attend classes at our local community college. -
Unrecognized Growth
I’ve been out working since I was sixteen years old. The training process has always come easily to me. With each new employer, I enjoyed the beginner phase. There is always new learning and processes to add to my knowledge base. There was one situation that came to mind and it was one where I experienced tremendous growth. -
Advice From Beyond
As you read this post, imagine a pristine park. A winding path winds through the trees, and at each curve in the path, a park bench is placed. Just behind the bench, an old-fashioned street light gives off an inviting warm light, shining on a person sitting on the bench. This scene feels welcoming, and since I have had a difficult day, I decide to stroll through the park. -
Middle School Nightmare
I don’t often remember my dreams. Occasionally, I will take a notebook and set it on my nightstand with a pen to write down snippets of the dream to ponder on later. There is one dream that I have repeatedly. It is the first day of school. I’m in the middle school age group. I’m excited about going back to school after summer break. I enter the school and realize that I haven’t signed up for classes, and I have no idea where to go first. I know I’m supposed to have a locker, but I have no idea where it is. I know that if I can find it, I’ll find the books I need to attend my classes.
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Making It Happen, But Not Always
Self-discipline has been a challenge for most of my life. Its absence has often left me feeling unfulfilled in work, relationships, and how I see myself. I realized early on that I often couldn’t trust my promises to myself. This didn’t become a pattern for me until I was in high school. -
Nine Years, One Condo, and Zero Rings
The year was 1976. Chris and I had been together for nine years. We enjoyed each other’s company and were good friends. We shared friends and fun times. Chris had a great sense of humor. He was a disc jockey on the local radio station. He would talk about things we had done together and as he told his story, I could barely recognize it as a place I had been. He was able to make it sound like an enviable experience and one that anyone would like to participate in. -
Managing Expectations
I’ve heard many opinions about the habit of having expectations—some directed inward, others projected onto those around us. I find it more productive to focus on what I expect of myself. After all, I’m the only one I can truly control.Expecting others to behave a certain way often leads to disappointment, unless we’re clear about what we need and willing to accept the outcome, whether or not it aligns with our hopes. Managing those external expectations means making conscious choices about how much we let others’ actions affect us.
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A Year of Change, Challenge, and Grace
I’m honestly in awe of how fast time flies these days. Back in the 1980s, when I was living in California, I remember a DJ on the radio once said:
“Life is like a roll of toilet paper—the closer you get to the end, the faster it goes.”
At the time, I laughed. Now? It hits a little deeper. It feels very true. -
Creating Christmas
By my admission, I have yet to be the active do-it-yourselfer in our family. I often find myself being a copycat, and the original ideas often escape me. When my sister was newly married and living in her first apartment, she had a great time making toothpick Christmas trees. I loved the one she made and decided to try my hand at making a similar tree. -
Christmas Terrors
This week’s topic is “What makes the holidays difficult and why?” I should rewrite it to say, “Why do I make the holidays so difficult?” All year long, I know that Christmas is coming. I know that I will be working and trying to juggle the activities of preparing for the holidays, yet I do everything else and leave the boxing, wrapping, and food tasks to the last minute. -
The Glue That Held Us Together
I remember thinking my Mom was the hardest-working person I had ever met. She made sure the house was always neat and clean. The downstairs got cleaned on Fridays and the upstairs on Thursdays. When the house was in the least bit faded, Mom painted the living room and other rooms by herself. When I was little, my Dad wore starched white dress shirts. Daily. Mom would sprinkle them and keep them in the fridge so they wouldn’t mildew. Then every week, she would iron these shirts until they were perfect. -
Five Simple Comforts
Without going into major logistics, I need five things in my life to keep me sane. Let me start by saying that these five things were not the most important when my husband was alive. He and I had a very full life with a great deal of excellent conversation. This writing is based on being by myself in a living situation. -
Treasures of the Heart
Heirlooms can take many forms. Some are very expensive items that have been passed down through generations. Our family heirlooms are more about sentimentality than value. In my family, we have items that carry meaning. When Mom passed away in 2004, she had told each of us girls which of her rings she wanted us to have. Mine was her cameo, Sandy’s was Mom’s grandmother’s ring, Michelle’s ring was a blue tiger’s eye and Lisa’s was Mom’s engagement ring. -
Why Beaver Dam?
Beaver Dam, Wisconsin is my hometown. Tucked away in the south-central part of Wisconsin, it has a magnetic draw that I can’t quite find the words to express. I have left Beaver Dam many times only to find myself longing to return. This community is an acquired taste. It appeals to some of us and others, it is a stopping place on the way to somewhere else. -
Happy with Hallmark
Watching a few hours of TV in the evening is enjoyable for me. It relaxes me and lets my mind wander. When my husband was alive we watched crime dramas. NCIS was a favorite. We also loved Castle and the various forensic science dramas. -
Lifelong Tooth Tales
Teeth have caused challenges in my life. First, when my permanent teeth started to come in, I had 7 baby teeth that never loosened up to make room for the next set. I had to have the teeth pulled. By this time, the new teeth were growing into the roof of my mouth. The dentist then had to slit the roof of my mouth to make a route for the permanent teeth to come down. I was tasked with pushing on the big teeth to keep them moving. Not so fun and painful. -
Window to Another World
I remember the day our first TV was brought into the house. It was a square box with about a 12-inch screen. The first thing that showed up was a news story from New York. It was in black and white and I can remember being very curious about it. It felt like a window to the world.
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Quirks and Conditions
Relationships come with many quirks and challenges. I experienced two failed marriages. I entered into each of these relationships with high hopes. I have learned that there were issues that got in the way of our happiness, that we never considered or discussed. Looking back, I realize I was very young and lacked the wisdom to make the best decisions. -
Curses! Foiled Again!
I don’t have a bucket list but if I did, the first thing on the list would be skydiving. Since my early twenties, I have talked about and wanted to go skydiving. -
Embracing Compassion
The emotion that I feel most often is compassion. It also moves frequently into empathy. I find myself trying to read others to identify what they are feeling. I have been told that I am too sensitive and yet, it is part of my emotional attachment to the compassion that I feel toward others. -
See You in the Fall
“Have a nice trip!” “I’ll see you in the fall!” These little phrases with double meanings used to be funny to me until I started experiencing unwanted falls with no explanation. -
Curly Chaos
I’ve never thought of myself as a “girly” girl. I avoid ruffles. I like pointed collars instead of rounded ones. V-necked T-shirts are my first choice. When it comes to hair, I have always avoided curls. They didn’t seem to suit me. -
Crayons, Music and Learning
From the beginning of Kindergarten, I loved going to school. I remember the enjoyment of doing interesting projects that I would never have thought of doing at home. It was great fun to have a room full of 20 to 25 other kids to interact with. -
Goldilocks and the Three Bears
Over the past several days, I have picked my brain to remember when I heard fairy tales. I remember the more recent telling of fairy tales through Disney films and children’s books. All of these mediums have softened up the original tales told by the Brothers Grimm. -
The Music That Shaped Me
The music I enjoy depends on my mood. I like music that I can sing along with. Sometimes if I sing loudly enough, I can change my mood. Fortunately, this can work in the shower where no one hears me but me. -
Spiritual Vignettes
My spiritual moments have not come in huge dramatic scenarios. They instead show up as small vignettes. It may be me saying a quick prayer when I need help from God and moments later I have an answer or solution. -
Raised with Grandma
My niece, Michelle came out of the rustic cabin on Green Bay shaking her head. She had a smile on her face but it was hiding her disbelief that my 10 year old son did not know how to make toast by himself. They had been in the kitchen when Matt asked her to make a piece of toast for me. She said “Wouldn’t mom be proud if you made it yourself?“ “Just put the bread in the toaster,” and he said “I know that!!” ‘At this point she said “then you’re halfway there! Next you push down the lever and when it pops up, you put butter on it”. -
Childhood Confidence
This week’s writing was one of the hardest to focus on. A favorite picture was needed as the topic. Do you know how many pictures I have from the last thirty-seven-plus years? Each image has its own unique story to tell. My most popular subject has been our son Matthew. Matthew at Halloween, Matthew at the zoo, Matthew just looking adorable. I think you get the picture. -
Memories of Lake Sherwood
There is a slice of my life that I haven’t written about in our weekly writings. I was married for the first time at the ripe old age of 18. My husband’s name was Clayton and he loved to explore Wisconsin. We spent weekends visiting forts and locating historical markers. Often, we invited my mom to ride along. She loved being included. -
Errant Cough Drop
I’ve loved Wild Cherry Cough Drops for years. When I needed something because I had a dry mouth, I would pop in one of my favorite drops. -
A Foot in Two Worlds
Fads in the ’60s featured white go-go boots, mini dresses, hot pants, and bell bottoms. One hairdo many of us wore was the “flip”. It required sleeping in big rollers and using gobs of hair spray. The midwestern humidity didn’t make it easy to maintain. -
Child Eating Centipedes
If I had been called a nickname that fit me well, it would have been gullible. My sister, Sandy, and I would spend hours playing in the basement. She had set up an area like a little house and we had our dolls in baby beds, eating places and a pretend kitchen. -
Red Flags
My early lifetime consisted of a series of rocky relationships. I credit the fact that I didn’t trust and act on my true feelings and needs. I went along with what other people wanted and considered to be the “right” thing for me to do. I had red flags in each situation that I needed to pay attention to. -
Surviving Wisconsin Summers
We live in Wisconsin. You might ask what this has to do with Porches and Patios? In the summer we have mosquitoes the size of crows and other flying creatures that make being outdoors difficult except if you have a screened-in space to spend your time in. -
Birthdays Come and Go
Our birthdays come and go and have some strange properties depending on where you are in this game of life. When we are young it seems like our birthdays take forever to come. Second only to the wait for Christmas is the wait for our next birthday. I would ask for something I wanted and mom would tell me to put it on my birthday list. It seemed that was the death of the want because it seemed like my next birthday was eons away. -
Simpler Times
I remember as a kid riding my new bike through the neighborhood. My hair was blowing in the breeze. My thoughts were on the beauty of the day and my mind was free of worry. I remember being in the present moment loving my freedom and enjoying the smells and sounds around me. -
There’s a Mouse in my House
I am going through a rather precarious time in my life. I am having a difficult time identifying anything that I am excited about or looking forward to. I am finding small joys in the little happenings of life. -
To Sleep or Not to Sleep
As of this writing, there is only one thing that gets me up in the morning and that is my alarm clock. What keeps me up at night is my greatest challenge right now. My bed is comfortable, my room is cool and inviting, and I love having my dog on the bed with me. So what’s the problem you might ask?
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5 Years Old & Frantic
Being afraid is a total-body experience for me. I sometimes feel like the mother duck who always wants to know that all of her ducklings are ok and safe. This feeling dates back to my first memory of being frightened. I was five years old. Dad was a salesman for a meat packing company. He would be on the road all day long and made it a point to always be home at night. -
Why Do They Call You That?
As the screen door closed behind my date and me, we heard Dad say “Remember Bumpy, your curfew is 11:00”. I hollered back “Yes Dad”. As we walked down the driveway, John asked me why Dad called me that.
I smiled and said that it was a long story. He said he wanted to hear it so I explained.
When I was a kid, the neighbor kids and my sister Sandy and I loved to play outdoor games. Often it
was starting to get dark and our visibility wasn’t what it should have been. On one particular occasion, I was running through the yard to get to the safe place where I couldn’t be tagged and didn’t see our metal clothesline pole. When I came to, I found myself with my arms and legs wrapped around the pole and all of the kids were trying to wake me up. The next thing I knew my head began to throb and I was moaning.
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Coming Home to Camp
Our family has a wonderful tradition of taking a 2-week family vacation every summer. It first started when we would go camping at Spikehorn Campgrounds near Bailey’s Harbor in Door County. We would arrange for campsites that were next to each other. Each year on New Year’s Eve, I would call the fellow who made the arrangements. We spoke so often, that he would send me an annual Christmas card. -
A Wallflower’s Tale
I couldn’t wait for the next Jr High Dance. I loved going into the dimly lit gym and feeling the anticipation of dancing with a really cool guy. This is pretty funny because I was the biggest wallflower you could imagine. -
Please Be Happy
I worked hard to find my place in our family. I was the youngest of three girls. My oldest sister was 9 years older. My middle sister was 5 years older. As the youngest, I often felt like I wasn’t allowed to do the things that the older girls could do. I wanted to help. My mom said I had a hernia so she wouldn’t let me shovel snow or vacuum or do anything that would exert extra effort. I wanted to be more of a player even though I was younger. My sister thought it was silly and somehow it was my excuse not to get involved. -
Letting Go of Overthinking
Sometimes when something is troubling me or I don’t understand why people do the things they do, I have a hard time not overthinking the issue. Thinking about a problem or situation can keep me awake at night and cause me to fill my mind with nothing else. -
Shallow Meetings
I have 3 very nice photos of myself with 3 different celebrities. One is with Barbara Mandrel. Another picture is with Olivia Newton-John. The third picture is with Barry Manilow. One would assume that I knew these folks. We are smiling and looking comfortable with each other. -
Favorite Things? Too Many to Count
Whenever I think of my favorite things I think of the “Sound of Music”.I have yet to figure out how to put my favorite things to music so they rhyme and become singable. -
Lookout Springtime
Purging is a concept that I have a challenge with. I think part of it is the lack of desire to make quick decisions about getting rid of things that I might need later. Setting that aside, it is time to focus on one area at a time and to get things that are no longer needed, distributed and out of the house. -
An Affair to Remember
When I think of romantic movies, I want to feel weak in the knees and relate to the relationship that I am witnessing on the screen. There have been several movies that I consider to be extremely romantic. Dirty Dancing, The Bodyguard, and Pretty Woman are near the top of my list. The one movie that takes the prize is “An Affair to Remember” with Deborah Kerr and Cary Grant. -
The Influence of Miss Davidson
It was fall and I was just starting the fifth grade at Washington School. My teacher’s name was Miss Davidson and I thought she was exceptional. She had been a teacher for a good long time and was older than the other grade school teachers I had in earlier grades. That would have made her at least 40 years old. You know, really ancient. -
In the Lap of Luxury
Luxury means different things to different people. I have been fortunate in my lifetime to feel luxurious many times. There were big events and small events that gave me the feeling of being complete and satisfied and living in the lap of luxury. -
My Main Street Experience
In 1993 I left working in the furniture store and wanted something that would reward my time and pique my interest. I applied and was hired to work for the Columbus Downtown Development Corporation. Our main focus was the restoration and rebuilding of the downtown Columbus area. This program was a part of the Department of Commerce and the Wisconsin Main Street Program. -
I Am Trixie Belden
Being young in the 50s was a whole different ball game than being young today. I remember 3 different pastimes. First was playing cowboys and indians with the neighborhood boys. Second was getting out our jump ropes, pogo sticks, and stilts and the third was pretending to be Trixie Belden and her sidekick named Honey from the Trixie Belden mystery series. -
Five on the Floor
At one time I owned a Honda Accord with a 5-speed transmission. It was a very fun car to drive and Matt would always comment that he wished he knew how to drive a 5-speed car. When he got his driver’s license, I asked him if he still wanted to learn how to drive a standard transmission. He jumped at the chance. -
Unexpected Vegetables
I feel lucky that I haven’t had a “worst cooking experience”. That is, of course, in my opinion. My family tells me that one thing my late husband prepared blew everyone’s mind. He had a salad he served between courses that was to serve as a ”palette cleanser”. It consisted of 3 scoops of lime sherbet, garnished with green pepper and salad tomatoes. He would normally serve it between two courses that had very distinct flavors like a strong flavored appetizer followed by a mild flavored beef dish. -
Sometimes I Feel Like a Sad Song
One of the few songs that helps put a smile on my face is “Oh What a Beautiful Morning” from the musical “Oklahoma”. Our class performed this musical when I was in high school and I loved the lyrics. I remember that the performance by our high school talent was awesome. If I open the curtains in the morning and the sun is shining and the sky is blue, the words “Oh What a Beautiful Morning” pop into my head. -
Believe Everyday
I enjoy quotes. They will often spring me into action and motivate me. Two of my favorite motivational speakers were Dr. Wayne Dyer and Mr. James Rohn. Wayne Dyer wrote a book with the title of the words of one of my favorite quotes. “You’ll see it when you believe it.” Dr. Dyer spoke about the concept that if your mindset is where you can take truths on faith rather than having visual evidence, you will see the results you want in your life.
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Who is Judy?
My life changed dramatically on April 4, 2023. My husband of 37 years passed away in hospice care in our home. I have had to rethink my life and begin a new chapter without my soulmate. I decided to return to the banking industry in a role that I have always loved. I am working as a teller and enjoying every moment of each day. I have met a wonderful group of people and feel the support that has been invaluable in navigating this difficult life change.
My best buddy is our dog, Quincy. She keeps me on the straight and narrow. She tells me when to go to bed and reminds me enthusiastically when it’s time for both of us to eat. My only regret is that she can’t talk, although she does try. She has filled a huge void for me, and I appreciate her every day.
Our son Matt is still living close by in Wauwatosa. He makes it a point to come home frequently to check on me and to make sure I’m staying out of trouble. As his Mom, I return the favor.
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Family History Shared
When I turned my key in the apartment door, I always felt the same sadness. I just wanted to go home. I wanted to be with my family. The move to Colorado back in 2005 had seemed like a good idea. It checked all the boxes. A good job for Michael, and a great school with a hockey team for Matt’s Senior year. It felt right since they had both helped me take such good care of my mom. Now, she had passed. Still, my gut was telling me “Don’t go”.
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Christmas Tree Evolution
When I was growing up, we believed that Santa brought our Christmas tree. This meant another trip for Santa but he never seemed to mind. The tree arrived, as if by magic, several days before Christmas. I would come down the stairs to find the long-needled pine tree dripping with tinsel and decorated with colored balls and multi-colored lights. I can remember thinking it was a great surprise. My sister would go through all kinds of gyrations the night before the tree arrived to get me to go to sleep. I was pretty gullible and didn’t put it all together until many years later. -
Holiday Disclosure
Santa Claus was a true test of my faith in my family and friends. I was the youngest of three girls and there was a five-year span between my sister Sandy and me. I was also gullible and trusting so I believed everything my sister and my parents told me. -
A Spotlight on the Holidays
When September arrives and the leaves start to turn, the kiddos return to school and best of all the holiday season begins. I like to take my holidays one at a time. I will avoid stores that start playing Christmas music in September. Granted the retailers have to maximize sales. At the same time, we all know that Christmas is December 25 every year. Do we really need to hear “Jingle Bells” in September to know Christmas is coming? -
Thoughtless Gift
Thinking about the “worst” present I have received has been a challenge. I have been lucky to receive just what I’d been wishing for from Santa and the important people in my life. I loved my skis and boots. My emerald earrings and necklace were unexpected and perfect. I always loved receiving new flannel pjs when I was a kid and my Bonnie Braids and Revlon Bride doll were just what I wanted.