Middle School Nightmare
I don’t often remember my dreams. Occasionally, I will take a notebook and set it on my nightstand with a pen to write down snippets of the dream to ponder on later. There is one dream that I have repeatedly.
It is the first day of school. I’m in the middle school age group. I’m excited about going back to school after summer break. I enter the school and realize that I haven’t signed up for classes, and I have no idea where to go first. I know I’m supposed to have a locker, but I have no idea where it is. I know that if I can find it, I’ll find the books I need to attend my classes.
I wander up and down the halls trying to see if anything looks familiar. Everyone coming and going knows where to go and what to do next. No one will stop to help me figure out my dilemma. I am looking for the school office, thinking that they may have the information I need. I can’t find the office at first, and when I do, the door is locked and no one will let me in. Finally, someone comes out, and I scoot in the door. The office is busy, and the people behind the counter are all helping other people. When my turn comes, I explain my situation as well as I can. The woman helping me looks at me like I have lost my mind.
She tells me that my schedule would have been mailed to me weeks ago. She tells me that my locker number and code would have come with my schedule. She says she is much too busy to go back and reconstruct this information. I asked her what I should do. She says I should have made sure I had what I needed before the first day of school.
I go back out into the hall to see if I recognize anyone that I might be able to go with. As I am looking, the bell rings loudly. I woke up in a cold sweat. I realized that the bell was my alarm clock. I feel frustrated and guilty for not giving greater priority to what I needed for school.
This dream seems to come up at a time when I am feeling unprepared and in a situation where I have waited too long to do what I should have done before now. Sometimes I can identify what I am handling poorly. At other times, I am totally at a loss as to what is causing me to have this dream.
Maybe that’s the real gift of this dream: it shakes me awake, not just from sleep, but from complacency. It reminds me that being unprepared doesn’t make me a failure; it makes me human. The important part is choosing what to do next: to pause, to breathe, to plan, and to step forward anyway. Because life, just like that first day of school, will keep ringing the bell whether I’m ready or not.
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