Perfectly Imperfect Discipline

I consider myself a disciplined person. When I have a dream, a goal, or a vision, I follow through on the actions needed to see the end goal.

But I know that a lot of people get stuck in the “discipline is perfection” trap. 

On the contrary, I believe that discipline is about consistency. Thinking that you have to be perfect discourages progress and can lead you to giving up when mistakes happen. 

This was the case when Craig and I decided to start our family. We started out with infertility work. Lots of doctors visits, expensive drugs, and nasty shots. I committed to driving to Milwaukee several times a week (before work) to make my appointments. And then when that didn’t work, we took a 90 degree turn and decided to adopt. Our journey to Russia was filled with too many ups and downs to recount. The process took 4 years to bring our boys home. But the goal was a family. Not pregnancy. The journey was messy but we succeeded in starting our family.

Another example of this in my life was when I decided to retire from teaching. Craig and I had talked about the possibility. I had said for many years that I wasn’t going to be a teacher forever…it was just that I still didn’t know what I wanted to be when I grew up. But my goal was to retire when I was 56. 

The joy I felt in my career started “declining”  right after I ran the marathon after I turned 50. I had such high expectations for my 50s. There were few, if any signs that being a teacher would soon be feeling more like a job, rather than a calling. That year changes in administration led to brutal changes. My student teacher lost her placement. Two of my co-workers were “non-renewed”. Other colleagues resigned and pursued jobs outside of education.

I didn’t think the transition was anything BUT perfect. 

And now I’m messily moving into my next chapter of working as a full-time life and relationship coach. I’m experimenting with reels on Instagram. Fighting with a new microphone (when the receiver is plugged in, no sound is recorded. at. all.) I swear that my lighting ages me 10 years, but I haven’t figured out how to use my new circle light without looking absolutely dead. My first reels have been cringy at best. But I am making offers and practicing my craft. 

I’ve even started seeing a coach again to help me process the fear and anxiety of looking foolish and ineffective. 

The pursuit of perfection can prevent growth. In reality, progress often happens through small, consistent steps, not through flawless execution.

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