In the early years, I was a people pleaser. I didn’t want to create waves. I was the teacher’s pet—the one who followed directions, finished assignments early, and made sure my name stayed in good standing. I didn’t argue. I didn’t question. I did what I was told, because somewhere deep down, I assumed other people knew better.

I didn’t trust my own opinions or ideas. It wasn’t that I lacked them—just that I didn’t think they held much weight. My inhibitions were rooted in the belief that someone else’s voice mattered more than mine. So I made choices by looking around and following the lead of others. When my sister Lisa chose a college, I chose the same one. I didn’t tour campuses. I didn’t compare programs. I just figured, she made a good choice. That’ll work for me too.