There was a day when I enjoyed seeing my reflection in a mirror or in a store window. I think this goes back to when I was 15 or 16. I was swimming laps every day after teaching classes at the YMCA pool. I could eat anything and it never showed up on my hips or anywhere else. I felt great and loved wearing the latest styles. My friends said I was too skinny but I didn’t care.
My impression of my body has been like a roller coaster. Too thin when I was 8 or 9 years old, too heavy at 20 or 21, just right in my late 20’s, chubby again…You get the picture. Then there was pregnancy and finally the biggest beast of all, MENOPAUSE. I’m still dealing with that one every day.
I look back at pictures of myself and remember in the past thinking I was too heavy when really, I looked OK. I’m at the “if only I could look that way again” phase now.
Back then I had no double chin, no belly fat and a waist that was enviably small.
I worked in a swimsuit everyday with no embarrassment!
Today? Truthfully, I think less about the look of my body and more about its ability to do the things I want it to do. Body image? One that makes me happen and happy. When I look in the mirror now, I know that perfect body is “in there” somewhere. I just don’t seem to be able to let it out. Help!!!